Siento que los gays somos cada vez más visibles y que eso es positivo, porque ayuda a tener una vivencia de la homosexualidad más sana, libre y feliz. Afortunadamente estoy en un momento en mi vida en el que me siento pleno, amado y valorado, preparado para hacer un aporte, y me gustaría que todos los gays pudiesen experimentar lo mismo, porque ser gay no debiera ser una limitación en nuestras vidas.
Para mí el desafío más importante en la vida es amar y ser amado. Se pueden tener éxitos en lo profesional, ganar muchos premios, pero nada supera en mi opinión a la felicidad de amar y ser amado, es algo en lo que sinceramente creo aún cuando en la actualidad se cuestiona tanto al amor romántico. Obviamente no creo en príncipes azules, ni en finales felices de cuentos de hadas, pero sí creo en que la felicidad se construye todos los días junto a la pareja. Creo además que todos tenemos derecho a ser felices.
Pensando en lo que la sociedad entiende por desafíos y éxitos, tendría que mencionar el haber ganado los concursos Mister Gay Chile 2009 – 2010 y Mister Gay International 2011 gracias a eso pude crecer como comunicador, viajar y conocer personas maravillosas. Fue una experiencia interesante el ser un Mister porque existen muchos prejuicios respecto de eso y la gente trata de hacerte encajar en un estereotipo, humildemente creo que no me dejé atrapar en un estereotipo porque para mí las bandas siempre fueron una plataforma para entregar un mensaje en beneficio de la población LGBTIQ y no un fin en sí mismo.
Tener la oportunidad de estudiar también fue un desafío exitoso porque en Chile la educación universitaria es muy cara, gracias al esfuerzo de mi familia y mi propio esfuerzo pude estudiar Historia en la Universidad de Chile y posteriormente un Magister en Comunicación. Además de trabajar en la fundación, soy profesor en el Liceo CEP, que tiene un 92% de alumnos vulnerables. Ser profesor es un trabajo muy desafiante y complejo, sobretodo en un contexto de vulnerabilidad social. Los profesores trabajamos formando personas, es una tremenda responsabilidad y la sociedad no siempre lo reconoce, no obstante es un trabajo que brinda grandes satisfacciones y que te enriquece como persona.
No me gusta hablar de comunidad gay, prefiero pensar en una población gay, lo que aparentemente es una diferencia sutil pero que para mí es una diferencia profunda y que tiene que ver con cómo entendemos lo que somos y lo que tenemos en común. Al ser gays tenemos en común el ser discriminado, porque si te quieres casar con tu novio no podrás hacerlo. La discriminación ante la ley es para todos iguales, independiente de que seas un gay rico o pobre. El estar todos discriminados por las mismas leyes es algo a partir de lo que si podríamos hablar de una comunidad, porque es algo común a todos. No obstante, sé que no a todos los gays les interesa luchar por sus derechos, en el fondo creo que no entienden la importancia de estos o probablemente lo que para mí es importante no lo sea para ellos. Ante todo hay que respetar la libertad de cada uno para ser quien quiere ser.
Creo que lo más cercano a la idea de comunidad gay en Santiago es lo que se ve en el centro de la ciudad. El centro de Santiago es similar a lo que Frédéric Martel llama un barrio alternativo, en su libro Global Gay, uno de los tipos de vecindario gay. “un centro histórico en decadencia (como en los downtowns de San Luis, Kansas City o Boston). Por una razón misteriosa, sin duda ligada a los precios ventajosos de los alquileres, los gays se instalan, lo mismo que los artistas y toda la <
Salir del closet fue algo liberador, sentí que me saqué un peso de encima y afortunadamente tengo una familia y amigos que me apoyan y aceptan tal cual soy. Yo tuve una infancia muy feliz en Panamá que fue donde nací. Mi padre es chileno y fue exiliado por la dictadura militar de Augusto Pinochet y en Panamá conoció a mi madre que es panameña. A Chile llegué a los 15 años de edad y tuve una adolescencia feliz, sabía que no sentía como se suponía que debía sentir, pero no lo aceptaba. No puedo decir que eso me atormentara, la verdad siempre me he sentido un afortunado y doy gracias por lo que la vida me ha dado. Miro hacia atrás y no me arrepiento de muchas cosas porque creo que he aprendido de mis aciertos y errores, de las experiencias buenas y malas. El miedo a salir del closet era porque pensaba que la gente me podía rechazar, pero no fue así. Finalmente a los 22 años salí del closet y la gente que me ama y a la que amo, me acepta tal cual soy y eso me hace muy feliz. Me alegra ver que a diferencia de lo que le pasó a los gays de mi generación, hoy en día es cada vez más común que no hay que salir del closet. Me refiero a los chicos que asumen su homosexualidad sin tantas complicaciones. En mi caso fue un proceso largo, en el que no aceptaba que era gay y que trataba de luchar contra lo que sentía, hasta que ya acepté que soy lo que soy y decidí vivir conforme a ello.
Salir del closet públicamente a los 29 años fue un poco más estresante pero resultó bien. Cuando entré al concurso Mister Gay Chile me entrevistaron por primera vez en TV y temí por la reacción de mis alumnos, de los padres y de mis colegas. Salvo contadas excepciones, la mayoría de la gente ha entendido que el que yo sea gay no me hace ni mejor ni peor profesor y eso es un ejemplo de que la mentalidad de las personas está cambiando.
A mi yo más joven le diría: no seas ciego, acéptate tal cual eres y prepárate que lo mejor está por venir.”
In English:
“Being gay means loving someone of the same sex. I do not like stereotypes about being gay – being a man or woman – because I believe everyone should be able to choose who they want to be. Unfortunately in our society, people are often limited to express themselves and that is something that must change. Both Chile and a great part of the world, throughout history, being gay is a synonym of discrimination, denial of rights and persecution in some cases. At present, Chilean society is experiencing a historical process in which issues such as gender identity and same-sex marriage are in debate. As I am interested in being part of this process, I agreed to be the spokesperson and Communications Advisor in Daniel Zamudio Foundation. The foundation was created by parents and friends of Daniel Zamudio who died of a homophobic attack. Unfortunately, a person had to die in Chile so that an Anti-Discrimination Bill, which was on hold in the Congress, could be passed. Being a member of the foundation, I can support in the struggle for equal rights, especially to social inclusion, diversity and family that are the focus of the organization.
I feel that gays are becoming more and more visible in society, experiencing a healthier, happier and free homosexuality. Fortunately I ‘m at a point in my life where I feel complete, loved and valued, ready to make a contribution to society. I wish all gays could experience the same thing. Being gay should not be a limitation in our lives.
The biggest challenge in life is to love and be loved. You can have professional success and win many awards, but in my opinion, nothing can beat the joy of loving and being loved. It is something that I truly believe in even when romantic love is being questioned so much. I do not obviously believe in Prince Charming, neither in happy endings of fairytales, but I believe that happiness is built every day with your couple. I also believe that everyone has the right to be happy.
Thinking about what society acknowledges as challenges and successes, I have to mention that I was Mister Gay Chile 2009 – 2010 and Mr Gay International 2011. Thanks to this experience, I was able to grow as a communicator, travel abroad and meet wonderful people. It was a very interesting experience because there are many prejudices about beauty contests and people try to make you fit into a stereotype. I used these contests as a means to deliver a positive message about the LGBTIQ population instead of just focusing in winning a beauty contest.
Studying in Chile was another challenge that I was able to overcome because University education is extremely expensive in this country. Thanks to the efforts of my family and my commitment I was able to study History at the University of Chile and later a Masters in Communication. Besides working on the foundation, I am a full time teacher at the Centro de Educación Pudahuel (CEP) High school, whose 92 % of students are vulnerable. Being a teacher is a very challenging and complex task, especially in a context of social vulnerability. Teachers educate students and it is a tremendous responsibility. Society does not always recognize the importance of being a teacher. However, it is a very gratifying job that enriches you as a person.
Instead of talking about the gay community, I refer to it as gay population. It is a subtle difference but for me it has a different deep meaning and it has to do with how we understand who we are and what we have in common. Discrimination is a common feature of being gay, since gay marriage is not legal in Chile. Discrimination under the law is the same for all gay people, either you have a high or low middle class background.
Being discriminated under the same law brings us together to form a community that is common to all of us. However, I know that not all gay people are interested in fighting for their own rights. I think they do not understand the importance of these rights and their priorities may differ from mine. First of all, we all need to respect others opinions and freedom.
The center of Santiago is the closest idea of a gay community in the city. This area is similar to what Frédéric Martel called an alternative district in his book Global Gay, one of the many types of gay neighborhoods: “A historical center in decline (like the downtowns in St. Louis, Kansas City or Boston). For some mysterious reason, obviously linked to the favorable rents, gays settled down in the area, as well as artists and the “creative class”. The neighborhood is reborn and “gentrification” appears soon. That’s what happened with the center of Santiago, where gays live and find many pubs and nightclubs for the gay audience. In my opinion, the best expression of the gay population in Santiago is not the neighborhood itself, but the LGBTIQ parade that this year was called Respect Sexual Diversity Parade. It is not only a manifestation of gays, lesbians, bisexuals and transsexuals but everyone who believe in respecting diversity. Mostly all the parades in Santiago are held in the downtown, but this parade is special because besides being a political vindication, it is a colorful celebration filling the streets with music and performances. The parade has the features of gay parades in other cities and the political discourse for equal rights
Coming out of the closet was something liberating and I felt that I lift a load off my mind. Fortunately, I have supporting family and friends who accept me for who I am. I had a very happy childhood in Panama where I was born. My father is Chilean exiled by the military dictatorship of Augusto Pinochet and there, he met my mother who is Panamanian. I moved to Chile when I was 15 years old and I had a very happy adolescence. I knew I did not feel like I was supposed to, but did not accept it. I cannot say that tortured me, since I have always felt fortunate and I thank for what life has given me. I look back and do not regret many things because I think I’ve learned from my successes and failures, good and bad experiences. I was scared of coming out of the closet because I thought people would reject me, but it was not. Finally when I turned 22, I came out to the people I love and they accepted me the way I am. I am glad to see that unlike what happened to the gays of my generation, today it is becoming more common not to come out of the closet. I refer to guys who acknowledged their homosexuality from the very beginning. In my case, it was a long process, in which I did not accept that I was gay and I was trying to fight against it, until I accepted myself and I decided to live accordingly.
Coming out publicly at the age of 29 was a bit more stressful but it turned out fine. When I participated in the Mister Gay Chile contest I was interviewed for the first time on TV and I feared the reaction of my students, parents and colleagues. Except for a few cases, most people understood that being gay does not make me a better or worse teacher and this is a clear example that the mentality of society is changing for acceptance.
My advice to my younger self is: Do not be blind, accept yourself as you are, and be prepared since the best is yet to come.”