Tag Archives: lgbt

Roman, Digital Media Executive, New York City

photo by Kevin Truong

Roman, in his own words: “I have come a long way in understanding and accepting myself as gay. Coming from Moldova, a small and socially conservative Eastern European country ruled by an unstable quasi-Soviet political regime and a highly homophobic society, my road to acceptance has not been simple. For 22 years of my life my family, neighbors and countryman compelled me to live in a society with rigid understanding of traditions imposed by religion, patriarchic social customs, superstitions and old-fashioned rules of acceptable behavior. Being gay in Moldova is nothing short of a life sentence to constant fear, loneliness, rejection, blackmail and torture. Gay people in that country are abused, beaten, raped or killed without getting any protection from local police, media or courts. Homophobia in Moldova is so widespread that gays are considered sub-human and not worthy of mention. After I had my share of bad experiences, I left Moldova and found myself in the United States.

The past three years have not been easy. Years of fear and abuse left a deep imprint on me, yet for the first time in my still rather short life, I found strength to admit to myself and my new friends that I am gay. Now I live in New York. After a multitude of new experiences, I am working on my professional career, feel liberated to seek gay friends and partners and joined a group that provides help to those who, like I, seek freedom to safely live as who they are. I currently volunteer for an amazing not-for-profit organization called No More Fear Foundation based in New York City. It allows me to help other LGBT asylum seekers who run from their native lands to the United States filled with fear, threatened and abused by their countries’ regimes, homophobic societies and their families. Notwithstanding all the pain and fear, I escaped and survived and I am grateful that I am given a chance to help others do the same.

So now I’m happy. I can finally live, breathe, speak and express myself freely without fear. I still have a long way to go, but I am sure that my future is safe and bright.”

Claudia and Claudia, with their Daughter Gabby, Santiago, Chile

photo by Kevin Truong

Claudia, in her own words: “Tenemos que decir que nos sorprendió de gran manera la invitación de Kevin a participar en su proyecto. Estamos honradas de formar parte de The Gay Men Project y le deseamos lo mejor en su maravillosa aventura.

Siendo una familia Lesbomaternal no es tan diferente a otras familias. Tratamos de ver lo que las cosas que tenemos en común y después de tener largas conversaciones, meditando sobre ello, tendemos a llegar a la misma conclusión: nos amamos incondicionalmente y hacemos lo posible como familia para celebrar, amar, y respetarnos a través de los buenos y malos momentos.

Ser la mamá de Gabby y la esposa de Claudia ha sido una afirmación de amor, estamos espiritualmente sincronizadas y nuestras almas han estado conectadas desde hace muchas vidas anteriores.

El 19 de agosto a las 1:29 am Gabby nació y recuerdo la primera cosa que le dije fue lo agradecida que estaba del Universo por habernos juntado, y le dije que Mami la tenía en brazos.

Ella lloró y apenas abrió sus ojos profundamente negros como la piedra onyx y nos miramos por primera vez. Gabby me ha enseñado tanto acerca de la vida y ser su Mamá ha sido lejos la experiencia que más me ha quitado el aliento a través de este viaje que llamamos vida. Gabby me ha demostrado lo que es el amor incondicional.

Luego 3 años a través de nuestro viaje juntas, mi esposa y yo nos conocimos el 2 de noviembre de 2007 nosotras nos enamoramos perdidamente una de la otra.

Jamás he amado a otra mujer como amo a mi esposa Claudia. Desde el primer momento en que mis ojos la vieron, me enamoré profundamente, sentí que la conocía desde mucho tiempo. Nuestro primer beso selló lo que se convertiría en una larga vida juntas nosotras las tres.

Siento que he sido bendecida de habernos encontrado una a la otra, siento que el amor prevalecerá y que en Chile el derecho de amarnos y protegernos como familia será una realidad. Más que matrimonio igualitario urgentemente necesitamos contar con los mismos derechos maternos. Es una violación a nuestros derechos humanos prohibir que Gabby sea legalmente reconocida por ambas madres. Estamos dispuestas a hacer lo que sea por nuestro derecho a amar. El amor hace la familia.”

In English:

“We have to say that we were pleasantly surprised when Kevin invited us to participate in his project. We are honored to be part of The Gay Men Project and we wish you the best on your amazing adventure, Kevin.

Being a same-sex family is not that much different from other families. We try to look at things that we have in common and after having long talks and meditating over it, we tend to come to the same conclusion: We love one another unconditionally and do whatever it takes as a family to celebrate, love and respect one another through the good and bad times.

Being Gabby’s Mom and Claudia’s wife has been an affirmation of love. We are spiritually in tune, and our souls have been connected from long ago.

On August 19th, 2004 at 1:29 am Gabby was born and I remember the first thing I said to her is how thankful I was that the Universe had brought her and I together, I told her that I will always love her and that Mommy was holding her.

She cried, and barely opened her deep black onyx eyes and we looked at each other for the first time. Gabby has taught me so much about life and being her Mom has been by far the most breathtaking mission throughout this journey we call life. Gabby has shown me what true unconditional love is.

Then 3 years across our journey together, my wife and I met on November 2nd 2007 we fell head over heels in love with one another.

I’ve never loved another woman as much as I love my wife Claudia. From the first moment I laid eyes on her, I fell deeply in love. I felt that I had known her for so long…our first kiss sealed what was to become a long life together, us three.

I feel that we have been so blessed to have found one another. I feel that love will prevail and that in Chile our family’s right to love and protect ourselves will become a reality. We want more than marriage equality, we urgently need to have the same legal maternal rights. It is a violation of our human rights to prohibit Gabby to be legally recognized by both her Moms.
We are willing to do whatever it takes to fight for our right to love. Love makes a family.”

Claudia, in her own words: “Desde el momento en que vi a Claudia sentí una conexión que jamás había sentido en la vida, fue increíble como nuestras almas se encontraron y se reconocieron inmediatamente. Desde ese mismo instante, hace 7 años atrás supe que quería estar a su lado y no separarme jamás de ella.

Todo este tiempo ha sido maravilloso despertar cada mañana a su lado y dormirme entre sus brazos, es como si estuviera viviendo un sueño del cual nunca quisiera despertar. Me ha enseñado lo que es el verdadero amor y con sus detalles diarios y diferentes demostraciones de cariño sigue alimentando este hermoso sentimiento en mí, además me ha dado el mejor regalo que alguien puede recibir. La oportunidad de ser madre, ha sido una experiencia preciosa, llena de desafíos y responsabilidades pero muy enriquecedora también, por lo que siempre estaré agradecida.

El momento en que nos convertimos en esposas si bien fue solo algo simbólico ha marcado un antes y un después en nuestra hermosa relación, siento que nuestro amor está consagrado y crece cada día, solo puedo agradecerle por llegar a mi vida, por enseñarme a crecer y ser mejor persona cada día.”

In English:

“From the moment I saw Claudia I felt a connection that I hadn’t felt ever in my life. It was incredible how our souls found each other and recognized one another immediately. Since that first moment, seven years ago I knew that I wanted to be by her side and never leave her.

All of this time it has been wonderful to wake up each morning by her side and go to sleep in her arms every night. It’s like a dream I never want to wake up from. She has shown me what true love is and her daily surprises and different ways of giving me affection keep what I feel for her so alive. Besides all of that she has given me the best gift anyone could ever receive. The chance to be a Mother, that has been beautiful experience, full of challenges and responsibilites, but so enriching at the same time, and for that I will be eternally grateful.

Since the moment we got symbolically married, it made a difference in our lives. We honored our beautiful love and our love grows everyday. I am so grateful that she came into my life and has taught me how to be a better person.”

Gabby, in her own words: “Tener dos mamás es divertido, me quieren harto por eso las quiero mucho, son muy alegres, sentimentales, divertidas ademas me dan amor incondicional me protegen, no me pegan, no me tratan mal me enseñan muchas cosas nuevas me siento super bien de tener dos mamás siento una conexión entre ellas y yo creo que nos mantendremos juntas por mucho tiempo siento alegría cuando estoy con ellas, cuando conocí a mami Clau sentí una conexión entre nosotras de inmediata que nos mantendría juntas.”

In English:

“Having two Moms is fun, they love me so much and that is why I love them. They are joyful, sensitive, fun and they love me unconditionally, they protect me, they don’t hit me, they don’t mistreat me. They teach me lots of new things and I feel really great having two Moms. I feel that I have a connection with them and I feel we are going to be together for a long time. When I met my mommy Clau, I felt conecction with her right away and that we were going to stay together.”

Karanja, Writer, Nairobi, Kenya

photo by Kevin Truong

Karanja, in his own words: “To be gay is to live with valour. It brings with it a host of responsibilities because as a gay man I must help to rewrite a story penned over hundreds of years. Few living creatures are more misunderstood than members of the gay community and as a gay man it is my duty to shake up age old beliefs, world views, stereotypes and miseducation. More importantly, to be gay is to be who I was born into this world to be. It is not a learned identity and the day I accepted this wholly is when I truly begun to live; and boy have I lived. I almost did not want to be gay because my friends from the church talked me into believing life would be better with Jesus and a gay man cannot possibly have Jesus. This was one of the bleakest moments in my life. Not even death has brought me such misery. But now I know who I am and it is nothing I will ever keep secret because to do so is to allow the disgusting, bigoted social construct that is homophobia a victory. I must say though, I hope that one day my children will be able to live in a world where nobody needs to say whether they are gay or not, because it really does not matter.

I’ve met a myriad of challenges on this journey. None important enough to discuss. My greatest success is not being closeted, followed by the friendships and relationships I have built with people from across the globe, across all classes of the social spectrum, from across all races, religions and genders, from across all sexual orientations. With an exception of two stray individuals who are no longer a part of my life, there is not one person that I ever called friend or family that deserted me when I came out.

(My coming out) story is a bit of a legend among my loved ones. I had told two or three very close friends I was gay but when I was 17 mother and I had a ridiculous fight and she threw me out. As it turns out, when she was tossing my shit out the day of my forceful eviction, she found my stash of Gay Times, lube, condoms and some articles I had been writing on being a gay teen in Nairobi. Two weeks later I was summoned before her terrifying presence. She confronted me and asked if I was gay so I came out with it. In the two weeks that I was away, my ninja mum had gathered so much intelligence about where I hang out, with whom etcetera. I have never known how. Coming out was the best thing I have ever done. I become a man and I became independent and more confident than I ever was. Mum and I are now super buddies. She doesn’t directly approach the subject because it is not her thing really but I make sure she is well aware even when she slips and mentions girlfriends to me that I am her beloved GAY son.

Well (the gay community in Nairobi) is gloriously gay, I’ll tell you that much. We have a whole bunch of cross-dressing gays, we have butch gays, professional gays, rural gays, expatriate gays, professional gays, blackmailing gays, thieving gays….the whole ten yards. It is growing rapidly and it is vibrant and getting bolder. I much prefer to stay away from all of it though. Quite a lot of man stealing, backstabbing, hearsay, character assassination and mudslinging. It’s like an animal pen.

(Advice, I’d give my younger self) SLOW THE BLOODY HELL DOWN.”

THE GAY MEN PROJECT

The visual catalog of gay and queer men around the world.

Tag Archives: lgbt

Roman, Digital Media Executive, New York City

Claudia and Claudia, with their Daughter Gabby, Santiago, Chile

Karanja, Writer, Nairobi, Kenya