“What does being gay mean to you?”

It is the first sentence in the questionnaire you have sent me. After the photo shoot, for the past few days, I have been having intense introspective thoughts on what it means to be a gay man. It is a question I had never tried to answer before, consciously and subconsciously. Not that I wanted to repress my sexuality, I think it was that I was afraid to give a definite label to my own identity.

After the days of self-examination, I came to a conclusion that my answer to the said question is ‘I do not know’. It is a vague concept that is still hard for me to grasp and give a clear description to. All I know at this point is that being gay is a significant and important part of me that affects me as a person one way or another. It is something I will know more and more, day after another. It will be a long journey that may be bumpy at times. Maybe I will never figure it out, know the absolute truth. And I will be fine with that, as long as I feel comfortable in my own skin and am proud of my orientation.

I thank the Gay Men Project for giving me this chance to sincerely evaluate who I am as a gay man, as a person, for the first time in my life. It feels great to know that there are people out there supporting my journey of finding myself.