Tag Archives: coming out

Drexler, Stylist, Portland, Oregon

photo by Kevin Truong

Drexler, in his own words: “Being gay is just a minor facet of who I am. It means I’m attracted to the same sex and adds another notch of diversity even though I feel no greater difference than others.

Challenges I’ve had would be people assuming, especially my straight guy friends, that because I’m gay I’m automatically attracted to them or that I only like sports to check the guys out. Things of that nature. Being pinpointed in certain conversations based upon my sexuality. Also not being able to be completely open with family members of strict religious backgrounds in fear of judgement. Successes I’ve had would be my happiness which was a long struggle to fight for and to finally be happy is one of the greatest accomplishments of my life.

The gay community in Portland is small, catty, but underneath it all is very protective of one another. I have a crew that consists of gay straight lesbian bi and trans and we keep to ourselves and yet maintain our aquaintence and respect for the community.

(With regards to a coming out story) I don’t really have one. Once I fully came out to myself I accepted it, told a friend who already had a hunch and it kind of slowly spread which initially pissed me off but I’m now grateful. There were people who literally stopped talking to me but that’s their loss.

I would tell my younger self to eat less. Workout more. Don’t cut your hair. Don’t blow your money. And yes. It’s perfectly normal and natural to be gay!”

A Note from Kara, a mom…

“As a mother of a gay daughter I am so encouraged by the strength in these stories. I know we have a long way in this Country and in fact around the world. But, for every beautiful face that has the strength and opportunity to stand and be counted for who they are the closer we are at having acceptance. Just a side note if I may. My husband and I have been happily married for 26 years. We raised our children in the church to be good Christians. Imagine our surprise when God blessed us with a little homo, lol. A Christian family with a gay kid, go figure. But, here’s the thing. God doesn’t make mistakes and you are exactly the person you were meant to be. Christ taught us to be Christ like in the world and that means to be the best “YOU” can be. And make the world a better place. Take care all and be gentle on yourself and others. Peace be with you.”

A Note From Kye, in Cape Town…

“Hi Kevin

I really admire what you’re doing.

I’m from Southern Africa. I’m 20 years old and I’m a working student. My story is fairly boring if I’m honest. But I think it’s good to share. I’ve spent a good amount of time reading some of others’ stories, so I was moved to submit mine.

I don’t remember exactly what age I was when I came out. It wasn’t a good time in my life and for a long time I was not okay. To be safe I’d say I was between 14 and 16.

I remember the day though, I sat with my mother in her office along with my older sister. My sister asked me a direct question, and I answered honestly. That pretty much wraps up my coming out.

My mother, being a devout Christian, paired with her self righteous attitude in life – decided she didn’t like my “decision” as it is called still to this day. She wanted to send me to doctors for blood testing. She did force me to see a psychologist, whom I subsequently befriended.

Since then it’s been a roller coaster ride with my mum, she openly resents me for being homosexual and regularly reminds me of how much God detests me for it.

Of course I’m doing much better since I came out. I’ve grown since, and matured into someone I am really proud to be.

My father on the other hand, took my coming out beautifully. He sat me down and apologized for every gay joke he’d ever made. He told me he loves me all the same. Sadly, he is a push over and bent under my mother’s iron fist.

So apart from the bullying in school, that’s all the negative over. Now for some positive.

In 2011, I re-met with a friend I knew from when I was 9 years old. Funny story really, we didn’t like each other when we were kids. We shared a best friend and there was some playground rivalry.

After falling in love, I put this poor guy through a year (or so) of indecision and emotional torture. Through which he persevered and waited for me, eventually he won me over.

He is the most kind hearted person you’d meet. We have the same goals and ambitions as well as morals. I’ve never been treated with this kind of respect in a relationship.

It’s been a crazy ride, but since having him in my life, I’ve felt more love than any of the bitterness, resentment and self-loathing that I knew so well before. It hasn’t been easy, but it won’t be, and it’s worth it – because it’s love.

So that’s it, I’ve probably left out loads of important information but there’s a chunk of my life, summarized.
And here we are on holiday in Cape Town <3"