Tive que lidar desde muito cedo com o preconceito, principalmente dentro de casa. Ao contrário da maior parte dos meninos, eu andava mais com as garotas; preferia ginástica olímpica ao invés de futebol. Era muito criticado por gostar de dançar, de cantar… acabei abrindo mão de muita coisa na tentativa de agradar meus pais. Lembro bem de como me sentia pressionado a ser mais “homem”.
Eu ficava muito triste e confuso com as cobranças. Não conhecia ninguém que fosse abertamente gay. Tampouco me reconhecia com o modelo caricato de homossexual que era mostrado na televisão. Parecia que não havia espaço no mundo para mim.
Com o passar dos anos, comecei a entrar em contato com ideias feministas por meio de artistas como Alanis Morissette, Shirley Manson e Gwen Stefani. Mas foi só no ensino médio que fiz amigos que compartilhavam dos mesmos interesses. Foi a primeira vez que me senti confortável para aceitar a minha gayzisse.
Nessa época, descobri que não estava sozinho; ao contrário – havia muita gente com os mesmos dilemas que eu. Descobri que era OK ser gay. Foi nessa época que passei a ter menos vergonha de quem sou.
Meus pais demoraram um pouco para aceitar essa condição, mas depois ficou tudo bem. Agora podemos conversamos abertamente sobre o assunto. Hoje, posso dizer que sinto orgulho de mim mesmo.
Se eu pudesse dizer alguma coisa para o Daniel criança, eu provavelmente diria para ele ter menos medo. Ser gay não é tão assustador ou “anormal” quanto parece. Diria para ele se divertir mais; ligar menos para o que os outros dizem. Para buscar a liberdade dentro dele, não nos outros ao redor.”
In English:
“In my life, being openly gay means more than being attracted to other boys. It is the first step in a long journey towards freedom. A path full of discoveries, possibilities and amazing experiences. But it was not always easy.
I had to deal with very early prejudice, mainly indoors. Unlike most boys, I walked over to the girls; preferred gymnastics instead of football. Was widely criticized for liking dancing, singing … I was just opening up a lot in trying to please my parents. I remember well how I felt pressured to be more of a “man”.
I was very sad and confused. I did not know anyone who was openly gay. Nor did I identify with the homosexual caricature model that was shown on television. It seemed that there was no room in the world for me.
Over the years, I began to become familiar with feminist ideas through artists such as Alanis Morissette, Shirley Manson and Gwen Stefani. But it was only in high school that I made friends who shared the same interests. It was the first time I felt comfortable accepting my gayness.
At that time, I discovered I was not alone; on the contrary – there were many people with the same dilemma as me. I found it was OK to be gay. It was then that I began to be less ashamed of who I am.
My parents took a while to accept this condition, but afterwards it was all right. Now we can openly talk about it. Today, I can say that I am proud of myself.
If I could say something to the child Daniel, I’d probably tell him to be less afraid. Being gay is not as scary or “abnormal” as it seems. I would tell him to have more fun; care less about what others say. To seek freedom within it, not the other around.”