Tag Archives: photos

Sam, Founder, New York City

photo by Kevin Truong

Sam, in his own words: “Outside of the literal definition of what being gay means, I’m sure every gay man or woman operationally defines it according to their own unique experiences. For me, being gay means liberation & honesty. Like many others, prior to coming out I had decided that life would be easier if I pretended to be straight. However, it was a completely miserable and lonely existence. Once I mustered the courage to ‘come out’ life was one hundred times better. It was an emancipation. I was free to be authentic and honest with the people that I love and care deeply about. Every meaningful friendship or acquaintance I’ve acquired since coming out has been so much stronger than the ones I made before, because now I am honest with myself and the people around me.

The biggest challenge I face is when my idealism is confronted with the current reality in the world. I dream of world where I can go anywhere and hold my partners hand, and if while doing so we entered the scope of vision of strangers, it would be as mundane and commonplace as the dog poop on the sidewalks on the Upper West Side. Many times, I go about life thinking that people no longer find gay people peculiar, until I walk the streets in Brooklyn, The Bronx, and in some areas of uptown Manhattan, and quickly become reminded by the glares that I could still get my ass whooped….still…in 2013. I want to live in a world where I can hold my partners hand without being afraid.

The gay community in New York is pretty vibrant and diverse. There’s lots to do and with a ton of great people. Although, at times, I think the community could do more to appreciate the strength of the diversity it possesses.

I came out to my family via e-mail at 3 o’clock in the morning. The subject line read: I’M GAY!!!. I have 13 siblings and being born & raised in the way of the Lord in Detroit, Michigan, you can probably imagine how much fun it was for me once my family started checking their emails later that morning 🙂

I have an amazing family that loves and supports everything I do. Although my worldview is different from theirs, and they are clear about what they believe God says about homosexuality, they’ve become LGBT allies and will be at my gay wedding. They’ll undoubtedly be the ones dancing barefoot on the dance floor. I love them. I am lucky. We’ve all grown a lot as a result of my coming out. I know that many other gay men and women often face rejection from their families, I’ve had an opposite experience.”

Johnny, Artist/Philosopher/Proto Assistant, New York City

photo by Kevin Truong

Johnny, in his own words: “Looking back I find that I had more difficulty coming to terms with my humanity then my sexuality. My sexuality was relatively meaningless in the larger picture. For me, figuring out my place in the world, in the universe and existence as a whole took precedence over my attraction to another person. Naturally there was attraction, but it was not something I understood completely or tried to understand at an early age. my feelings were my feelings and they hadnt been influenced by anything other then my innermost self and though I was perhaps too young to comprehend that, I did on some spiritual level, as I suspect all living things do. It was intuitive and I didnt give it much thought. I knew I was different then my peers though, different than other boys, mainly from what I was perceiving from the world, from others. In fact it was more external pressure to address my orientation then an internal need or desire.

I’ve always been somewhat of a private person by nature, blame it on my Cancerian roots. I never felt the need to broadcast my sexual feelings, after all are my sexual encounters/fantasies anyone elses concern other then my own? I wasnt hiding, but I never heard ‘straight’ folk letting everyone know their sexual preferences or ever having the need to, but it seemed that being gay was something that others had to know about, was something period, like some kind of warning. I never thought I was a danger to anything. I approached my budding sexuality with caution because there was something powerful and even divine about it. It was like some powerful magic that had to be handled with care and so it was only once I was ready to.

There are times when life has seemed scary and too much to bear, but unto myself, I realized that my experience in the world was rarified . And I’ve always been attracted to the rare and exotic things in life. If nothing else, ‘liking guys’ has made for a richer experience of my life, I can appreciate, openly, a greater number of beautiful things for instance, and that’s just one, of an infinite number of attributes that make me unique. But thats the case with every other living thing in the universe. And in that I realized that we, as in all of us, as in everything… are one in the same.”

Alden, Creative Vagabond, New York City

photo by Kevin Truong

Alden, in his own words: “My experience as a gay man has been such an evolution that I’m not sure I can define it in any way that would leave me satisfied. At times it hasn’t played a role in my life (to my knowledge) and like many I tried to suppress it’s role for quite a while. I began coming out when I was asked by a new friend just after I had graduated college and moved to Boston if I was straight or gay, and I decided to be honest. It took quite a while to fully come out. The most important people I came out to were my parents and I did this in a thank you note on my birthday just last year (in 2011). I thanked them for giving me the opportunities they have, and the privileges, and dropped the ‘I’m gay’ at the end hoping it would be as casual as ‘best regards’.

At that point I had mentally come so far that it was casual, it had become just another facet . . . not a defining aspect. I think it’s somewhere in the middle of these(a defining facet perhaps?). Most of the challenges I’ve experienced have been with myself I’d say. I stood in my own way for a long time before coming out, and dragged my feet a bit in finally doing so. Now that I am out and living New York my experience has been interesting. It’s easy to find yourself falling at different points on the litmus test of ‘straight’ to ‘gay’ scenes depending on what kind of evening you’re looking for, and my experience has led me to nights out with friends in gay bars, and straight alike. I’m only on my 6th month here, so I’m looking positively toward my future more easily than reflecting on my recent past.”

THE GAY MEN PROJECT

The visual catalog of gay and queer men around the world.

Tag Archives: photos

Sam, Founder, New York City

Johnny, Artist/Philosopher/Proto Assistant, New York City

Alden, Creative Vagabond, New York City