Tag Archives: kevin truong

Chris, Flutist, Memphis, Tennessee

photo by Kevin Truong

Chris, in his own words: “Moving to Memphis has really changed what it means for me to be gay. Having always lived in huge, gay-positive cities (Toronto and New York), it was always very easy to take a certain amount of privilege for granted. I come from a very supportive family and have experienced a really limited amount of homophobia in my life. I also had a number of wonderful queer role models from an early age, and I was curious enough that topics like basic Queer Theory, Gender Studies, LGBT History, etc. were a large part of my discourse with these people, particularly in college.

Coming to Memphis showed me how lucky I was to have had all of those things. Not to say that Memphis is an unenlightened or back-water town: many Memphians are very progressive, particularly when compared to lots of other cities in the South. But it struck me especially in volunteering at the Memphis Gay and Lesbian Community Center (mglcc.org) – I would meet people, often young people, who just hadn’t ever heard about Stonewall, or gender-neutral pronouns, or whatever else…I gained so much respect for these folks. It makes me think of my coming out as a kind of stepping into something that was already prepared for me, at least in my head. Coming out in the South must be so much more a process of finding oneself than joining a group.

The other fascinating thing about working at the Center was coming up close with the people who built it: pioneers at a time when it really was radical and potentially dangerous to be openly gay in Memphis. Another instance of a group of people showing a strength and courage that I have just never needed to find in myself. So many people downplay the importance of their gay-ness in their lives: “my sexual orientation is the least interesting thing about me”, etc. While it might be true that there are more interesting things about me than my sexual orientation, and while things may be different in twenty years or if I move back home, Memphis has shown me how important it is to be strong in my gay identity. It seems to me the gays of the present have a responsibility to carry on the cultural legacy of the gays of the past, while providing a good example for the gays of the future.”

Ryan and Hunter, Raleigh, North Carolina

photo by Kevin Truong

Photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

Hunter, in his own words:“My name is Hunter. I am a 22 year-old native of North Carolina currently living at Lake Tahoe in Nevada. I came out of the closet Valentines day of last year. My journey out of the closet and becoming who I am today is one I am proud to share; however, finding the love of my life is why I am emailing you today.

I met Ryan mid-august of 2013 in Raleigh, NC via OkCupid. Both of us were definite “haters” of online dating but participated due to deviant peer pressure of friends. I was on the verge of deleting my account since I had plans to move to Nevada in a week but one night Ryan messaged me asking to hang out. Ryan had just moved to Raleigh from Clemson, SC and was looking for someone to casually hang out with and show him the city. Thinking this was a harmless commitment, I said yes! It was a night of random story sharing and me serving as an obnoxious city tour guide. I felt a connection.

We parted ways with a kiss I wanted to last forever but knew had no future. That was it, so i thought. I went back home, packed my belongings and hit the road to Nevada. Each day away from him I could not help but dream about how wonderful of a guy he was. We maintained communication throughout my trip and settling in, both knowing we were avoiding the reality that we would never see each other again. A month went by and we only grew closer. Every night we would talk or skype just because. I knew I liked him and he the same but we were both denying any form of relationship. Mid-september I made up an excuse to return to Raleigh to “catch-up with friends” and he and I can hang out. I booked my flight and headed east. I landed in Raleigh and there he was, standing at baggage claim waiting for me. I knew from his smile and our embrace that this was more then a friendship. The brief visit seemed like a lifetime of bliss. The whole time I had this feeling inside that I had not felt before and too confused to talk about it. Love.

Standing before security, back at the airport, we stared in to each others eyes, both full of tears, knowing exactly how momentous the visit was and how much we truly cared for each other. We had both found love for the first time.

Ever since that September visit we see each other once a month for an extended weekend in a place of our choice ( San Diego on March 14th!!). We are 2700 miles a part for now but every day, every hour, every minute I’m with him, I know I have found love. Ryan is the love of my life and I want to share our story for all to hear and understand that it does exists no matter how shitty things are. I am planning to move back to Raleigh and back to Ryan for I will do anything to be in his arms and see his face every day for the rest of my life.

Thank you for all you are doing Kevin. Your story and project inspires me. I would love to be a part of your project if you are looking for participants.

Stay strong.”

Mark and Wayne, Pigeon Forge, Tennessee

photo by Kevin Truong

Mark, in his own words: “Being gay has meant different things to me at different times of my life. In the early years it was a burden. Being raised in the south and in a Christian home, my family had very strict beliefs. And being gay did not fit at all. I mean you can’t blame them for that, Mama and Daddy taught us what they “thought” was correct and to them, being gay was a sin. You teach what you know I guess. So I struggled for a long time with that. At this point in my life I could never imagine not being gay, it’s normal. I have a fantastic life with a great man and a loving family. I’m truly blessed. I suppose I have been lucky, I have not had many challenges in my life as far as being gay goes.

Wayne and I stay so busy with work that we don’t have much of a social life. We have a handful of wonderful friends. A good night out for us is getting together with them for great food and drinks and just to catch up. I really don’t feel connected with the gay community here in Pigeon Forge and Sevierville maybe because most people drift through the area and tend not to settle here, so the scene changes every few years.

If I could go back many years and give my younger self advice there would be two things: I never really knew what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wanted to entertain people that much I knew for a fact. But as far as college went I was just not that into it because nothing at all interested me at the time. So first I would tell myself to go to culinary school. I would love to have been able to go fresh out of high school. I still would. Second I would simply say this “Days are long and masturbation is fun. Go for it!! You won’t go to Hell for playing with it!” Do you know how much I suffered over that? Too much!”

Wayne, in his own words: “I have been very fortunate and blessed to have had a 35 year career as a professional dancer/singer/actor/choreographer. This life has allowed me to travel the world in ballet and jazz companies, revues, television, movies, the cruise industry, cabaret and theme parks. I have loved every minute of it. I am glad I decided to put down roots in east Tennessee which is where I met my best friend and partner Mark. We have endured it all for the last 19 years, and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I love grocery shopping and couponing, which helps with our addiction to the kitchen. We spend most of our time planning and creating food. Most of the time it is worth the happy dance…food should make you happy and worthy of a dance!

Other than the love for our four legged children and the love of crafting, which I take much pride in, I have a simple and complicated life like everyone else. Life is way too short to not enjoy each day that is given to us. Make the best of each of them. Happiness is not a goal, it is a journey.

As far as coming out…I don’t think I ever did. By that I mean that I always knew even as a young child. And I was fine with that. I didn’t feel that it was wrong and I never lied about it. I didn’t flaunt it but if someone would ask I would tell them the truth. My senior year of high school I was working with and then dating a man that was 20 years older than myself. I never thought of the age difference and I was the one that chased him till he gave in. My parents kept on and on about the time we were spending together, so I asked them what they wanted to know. Dad finally cornered me while I was cleaning out my closet (I know…how perfect) and asked me “Are you seeing ***** because he is gay?” To which I replied “No I am seeing him because I think I am in love with him”. They had some issues to deal with of their own but I was never disowned or kicked out of the house. I have wonderful parents, brothers, nieces and nephews and in laws that love and support us both. I wish the same for everyone else.”