When I was a little boy, I thought of being attracted to girls, because this was the only reality I knew and so I started love relationships, but whenever the situations became intimate, I gave up (unfortunately I broke so many hearts). After that, I started to give a look around during the end of my second year at high school and I discovered that there was a hidden world, lived by wonderful, particular but common people, who were scared to show themselves. But I didn’t want to believe it. I said: “No, this is impossible. I can’t be gay, it’s wrong. Maybe I need to find the right girl”. So I tried to force myself not to be gay.

After a while, the desire of having someone by my side, with who share also stupid things, began to be felt. So I thought back to my sexuality. I thought: “It still is impossible that I’m gay, but maybe I’m bisexual. Yes, it has to be this. If I’m gay, how can I explain it to my parents?”. I decided to talk about my sexuality to my best friends (at that time they were 4 girls) and they gave to me their support, they said: “No matter if you like boys or girls, you ‘re special and we will always love you”. They were my strength, they were the reason that I came out to my parents, because I knew that if the situation got bad, I could count on them. Always.

I came out to my parents about 4/5 years ago, when I was 16, but not spontaneously, I had to do. I was so scared, because I knew what my parents thought about gays.

There was a blog about my school (called GossipGirl Frattamaggiore) and one day the anonymous writer wrote about me and what I did at a gay party ( I kissed a boy). My mum have a facebook account and she saw that I post the article on the wall of one of my bestfriends. After reading it, my mum called me in the living room and she said: “There is something you want to tell me?”

“Emh no, why?” But inside I knew she knew.

“I’ve just read an article about you.”

“Really? I don’t know what you are talking about” and my heart started to beat so fast that I thought it would have stopped.

“Ok mum” I said “What you read, it’s true. I’m gay. I know that I’m a disappointment as a son, but what else I can do? That’s what I’m and believe me when I say that it’s difficult for me to admit that”

Unexpectedly my mum told to me: “Bebe, I’m your mother, I’ve always known. I put you into the world, you’re my son and my love for you is unconditionally.”

My life’s begun with my coming out. My mum helped me to told what I am to my father and my brother (they also accepted my situation, with some difficulty of course, they are men, I know that it’s hard for them to understand).

I know that Italy is not ready for us, but the situation’s changing, I can feel that. I changed minds of the guys in my school (now I’ve a lot of straight people that approve my cause). My first relationship ended so badly. After a month, my boyfriend left me, because his parents had known that we were togheter. They didn’t take it well. But now I know that people around me are open-minded, I can see in their eyes (not everyone, the road is still so long).