Category Archives: Uncategorized

Steven, Make-up Artist, Batesville, Mississippi

photo by Kevin Truong

Steven, in his own words: “Being gay, to me means simply being; staying true to who I am; the way I was meant to be.

I really try to focus on not complicating myself, so that I have a more clear since of who I am at all times.
So I guess, being gay means being completely honest with myself.

The only challenge I can say I have encountered was my struggle with balancing religion and homosexuality. I used to lay in my bed as a child at night, every night praying to be “straight”. I just wanted to be normal; accepted both in society’s eyes and God’s. However, age taught me that I could be both gay and accepted and loved by my maker. I learned to keep my faith in God, while remaining the way He created me. His love for everyone, homosexuals included gives me a never ending peace.

There is a line from the Tony Award winning musical “RENT” that always came to mind while struggling with acceptance.

“To sodomy. It’s between God and me.” -Jonathan Larson

Being gay is mine and God’s business. It took me a while to not let other people make it their own.

Unlike most gay men, I don’t really have a coming out story. I am very fortunate to have a very “out and proud” uncle. My dad’s brother, cleared a nice big path for me to act and be who I was every step of my journey to adulthood. Not once was I ever ridiculed in my own house for playing with Barbie or dressing up and pretending to be Dorothy from “The Wizard Of OZ.”

After meeting and getting serious with the first guy I ever dated, I wanted to introduce my family to him. So to bring it up, I just started using masculine pronouns in conversation with them. “Mom, I’ve been dating someone, and HE is so amazing. You’re gonna love him!!” And, she did. She still does.

I had it easy. Thank you Uncle Jim.

Apart from 3 or 4 guys on Grindr, there is no gay community in Batesville, MS that I am aware of.

This would be my advice to my younger self:

“Don’t bother trying to figure yourself out, or letting others label you too much. You are always evolving. You always will be. Be the best at what you love doing, and love those you love wholeheartedly.”

Pablo, Buenos Aires, Argentina

photo by Kevin Truong

Pablo, in his own words: “The way I see it, being gay is just another part of my personality. I don´t follow a so-called “gay lifestyle” and I usually don´t like things gay people like. I´d like to think of me as a guy who likes guys.

Being gay in Argentina doesn´t mean hiding all the time. Gay marriage is legal here and being homosexual is not frowned upon, as it is in many other more “civilized” countries. It´s just OK to be gay. You won´t be rejected in a job interview for being openly gay, and cases of homophobia are quite uncommon. I don´t see any challenges or successes that I got from the sole act of being gay. I personally think that these challenges and successes are part of our everyday life, our social circle, our community and, most important, our attitude. We have to live with it. That´s all.

To be honest I haven´t come out yet. I know that my mother and my sister know something about my sexuality but we don´t talk about it. My father doesn´t know anything. I don’t know if he is blind or if he is just not accepting it. Anyways, I feel that I am stuck with this because I don´t want to hurt him.

(With regards to the gay community in Buenos Aires) I would say that it is very active. Buenos Aires is a big city, so there are parties almost every weekend. Being gay is accepted and normal.

(With regards to advice to my younger self)I would probably tell myself not to be afraid to come out. The sooner, the better.”

Chris, Teacher, Phoenix, Arizona

photo by Kevin Truong

Chris, in his own words: “Being gay to me means simply that I am open to an emotional and physical relationship with someone of the same gender as me. It also means that I choose to live that life openly and publicly in all facets of my life.

I have been very gifted to have a family that loves me for me, and that includes my being gay. This reality was never an issue for them and it is a testament to the genuine and authentic love that we share as a family. My friends and especially my work colleagues have always appreciated my forthrightness and honesty though it has never been “my burning issue.” My burning issue is Public Education and the support of it and that includes supporting LGBTQ youth as they travel on their evolving journey.

The gay community (in Phoenix) is very diverse and spread out but it also reflects the larger social community of Phoenix and its surrounding areas. The expansive spread of the Valley (thats how we refer to the area of Phoenix) causes there to be a lack of community feel at times like other older American cities. The challenge comes in making sure that we can come together over issues that affect us all as gays and not allowing those looking to bifurcate us as a way to keep us suppressed.

I was convinced for many years (pre-teen and teen) that the feelings I was having were a phase or something that I could compartmentalize. I dated girls and women, but always saw my sexuality as something that I could turn on or off. It wasn’t until I realized that there was a very supportive and vibrant community in Chicago (where I lived until 28) and that I did seek to have more than a physical bond with a man, that I chose to come out at 23. I think one needs to come out to oneself before they come out to others, something others need to realize is that the coming out process is personal first, and public second.

(Advice I’d give my younger self) Chris, you did things correctly and the way they should have occurred for you. I am not sure I would advise differently, since I cannot change the past, but in hindsight, I’m quite proud of the path my life has taken, and I not about to start to eulogize myself! :)”

THE GAY MEN PROJECT

The visual catalog of gay and queer men around the world.

Category Archives: Uncategorized

Steven, Make-up Artist, Batesville, Mississippi

Pablo, Buenos Aires, Argentina

Chris, Teacher, Phoenix, Arizona