Generally, (the biggest challenge) is the culture. (People think) You have traveled out of the country, that is why you have brought (being gay) into this country. Or normally our funds come from outside the country, so mostly they say ‘You’ve been paid, you’ve been funded so you can continue the Western agenda.’ So basically I think (the biggest challenge) is the culture and religion.

Basically, the general thing about being an African man, if you’re a man you have to behave like a man. At a certain age you have to start courtship with girls, and after that is marriage, and after marriage is having children. That’s generally on the African continent how they perceive you. A family is between a man, woman, and children.

(With regards to progress) Africa on a whole is really hard. As we all know, in South Africa at least (being gay) is legal there, but we thought once South Africa legalized other countries would start replicating that. But it’s the other way around. We found out they wanted even stronger laws that will criminalize homosexual acts, so it’s really difficult. So I think in Africa we still have a long ways to go. But what I can say as a Kenyan, as far as we are, what we have really tried (working for) is not human rights issues or even marriage, it’s specifically on health. So when we start talking about health issues, people know that if it affects gay people it might also affect the heterosexual community. (Then) they are willing to start listening to you. They are willing to accommodate, they are willing to tolerate.

The biggest health issue for gay men is if you are sick as related to how you have sex to another man, there is a lot of stigma with the health care providers. And if they are willing to help you and to listen to you, they don’t know how to handle your case. So there is a lot of ignorance. And the other thing, especially in the rampant case of HIV and AIDS, the only health promotion that you can see in all the media, all the publications, anything that kids are growing up knowing, is that HIV can only be contracted between a man and a woman. So we have cases of people saying, ‘I didn’t know. I thought when having sex with a man, I’m safe. Because what I’ve been shown has only been man and woman. If I’m a man and have sex with a woman, that’s when I’ll contract HIV/AIDS. So if I’m with another man, I’m safe.’ So with those kind of things, we find that people don’t know if they are at risk or are at a higher risk to contract HIV/AIDS because they don’t have that information and they can’t find that information. So we are trying to bridge the gap and trying to help in that scenario and trying to come up with health promotion that says (gay men) are even more vulnerable, because we don’t see that today.

(The gay community in Nairobi) is thriving and it’s diverse because we find that a culture of Nairobi is that people don’t care what you do. Whatever you do in your house, as long as it doesn’t affect me. So you find that people have an ‘I don’t care attitude, unless it affects me.’ Unlike a city like Mombasa, which is mostly (about) majority. But you find in Nairobi people are busy, doing good to others, people want to make their living, so they won’t mind about my business. And that has made gay people live better in Nairobi, people can live freely in Nairobi. In fact, sometimes I call Nairobi the New York of East Africa. Because if you look at East Africa, Nairobi is more safe than the rest of the cities. You can get health care services, you can go to a doctor and talk about issues and the doctor doesn’t care.

I think for me, and for my hope, I have been fulfilled because I’ve been working for the LGBTI (community) for the last eight or nine years. And I’ve seen a lot of growth, and a lot of impact that we have made for the community. Because what has been happening before for the last five years was we had straight people working in a clinic which is for gay men. And they would not really understand our issues. So for now, what is happening currently, gay people are running their own clinic. So that has always been my dream, and I hope it continues. That we ourselves know the the issues had, we know what is our problem, and we are the people that are going to solve our problem. So that has been my dream and I see now that it is coming up.

Understanding that I was gay (Michael) took much longer than most and as a result it caused a lot of turmoil in my life and the lives of those around me. Finding a loving, honest relationship, one that feeds my soul and makes me a better person is the single greatest success I’ve realized. I am a very lucky man.

By the time I came out (18 years ago) I had been a leader in the church, I was pre-med, I had been married and divorced, and had experienced such emotional struggles with who I was and who I was expected to be that I simply didn’t want to fight anymore; several times I reached the point that I simply thought that life shouldn’t have to be so hard to live. I had the sense to go get professional counseling, I surrounded myself with people who really did care about me and I got through it. I appreciate my life now so much more because of those hard times and my heart breaks for so many kids that don’t make it through. Coming out is different for everyone and it’s very personal. The key is to remember that life is worth living and you can make it because there are people that want to see you happy, even if they can’t express it the way you need to hear it.

Gays in Canyon Country? I thought we were the token gays here . I really have no idea. We have so many loving straight neighbors that we don’t want for much in Canyon Country. We have our close gay friends that live around the country that we see regularly but in Canyon Country it’s just us and the alpacas; we like it that way I think.