Monthly Archives: August 2014

A Note From Martin…

“My name is Martin M. I am 28 years old. I was born in a typical strict religious family. I realized however that I was and am anyhow different because I would be more attracted by guys than by girls. To divert this strong and inpulsive feeling, I decide to concentrate myself only on two things: school and sport.

Sometimes, other youngsters and my own siblings would mock at me saying that I am a female in a man’s body. This was the reason why I always tried to be inactive in front of others and “cold”, but it did not help me any further. I waited until the age of 25 to have my first sex because my family started questioning my manhood. I was not satisfied at all. Some weeks later, that is to say the 14 th of September 2013, I moved out of the family house and rent a room close to my campus. There I started meeting other guys like me and having fun and sex. Unfortunedly I had to hide myself because of my family and the situation in my country. Homosexuals are mistreated and sometimes beaten in the streets. I had the chance to live my sexual life with my first partner. We have our plans. He stood by me and supported me more than any other person. Even though I am now in Germany, I think of him every day. I hope, we will be together some day. I decide to travel to Germany to try to live my live and to be happy because I know that if my family happens to realise my sexual orientation, I will be banned. I just hope one day to be happy and to live my life. I am such a tender and loving person. Even if I am attracted by men it is not my fault. I was born like that and will die like that.. When I finish my doctorate degree in three years, I aim at moving into another country where people are more open to topics like this one. Please help me.”

A Note from Kara, a mom…

“As a mother of a gay daughter I am so encouraged by the strength in these stories. I know we have a long way in this Country and in fact around the world. But, for every beautiful face that has the strength and opportunity to stand and be counted for who they are the closer we are at having acceptance. Just a side note if I may. My husband and I have been happily married for 26 years. We raised our children in the church to be good Christians. Imagine our surprise when God blessed us with a little homo, lol. A Christian family with a gay kid, go figure. But, here’s the thing. God doesn’t make mistakes and you are exactly the person you were meant to be. Christ taught us to be Christ like in the world and that means to be the best “YOU” can be. And make the world a better place. Take care all and be gentle on yourself and others. Peace be with you.”

A Note From Kye, in Cape Town…

“Hi Kevin

I really admire what you’re doing.

I’m from Southern Africa. I’m 20 years old and I’m a working student. My story is fairly boring if I’m honest. But I think it’s good to share. I’ve spent a good amount of time reading some of others’ stories, so I was moved to submit mine.

I don’t remember exactly what age I was when I came out. It wasn’t a good time in my life and for a long time I was not okay. To be safe I’d say I was between 14 and 16.

I remember the day though, I sat with my mother in her office along with my older sister. My sister asked me a direct question, and I answered honestly. That pretty much wraps up my coming out.

My mother, being a devout Christian, paired with her self righteous attitude in life – decided she didn’t like my “decision” as it is called still to this day. She wanted to send me to doctors for blood testing. She did force me to see a psychologist, whom I subsequently befriended.

Since then it’s been a roller coaster ride with my mum, she openly resents me for being homosexual and regularly reminds me of how much God detests me for it.

Of course I’m doing much better since I came out. I’ve grown since, and matured into someone I am really proud to be.

My father on the other hand, took my coming out beautifully. He sat me down and apologized for every gay joke he’d ever made. He told me he loves me all the same. Sadly, he is a push over and bent under my mother’s iron fist.

So apart from the bullying in school, that’s all the negative over. Now for some positive.

In 2011, I re-met with a friend I knew from when I was 9 years old. Funny story really, we didn’t like each other when we were kids. We shared a best friend and there was some playground rivalry.

After falling in love, I put this poor guy through a year (or so) of indecision and emotional torture. Through which he persevered and waited for me, eventually he won me over.

He is the most kind hearted person you’d meet. We have the same goals and ambitions as well as morals. I’ve never been treated with this kind of respect in a relationship.

It’s been a crazy ride, but since having him in my life, I’ve felt more love than any of the bitterness, resentment and self-loathing that I knew so well before. It hasn’t been easy, but it won’t be, and it’s worth it – because it’s love.

So that’s it, I’ve probably left out loads of important information but there’s a chunk of my life, summarized.
And here we are on holiday in Cape Town <3"

photo provided by Kye

photo provided by Kye