photo by Kevin Truong
photo by Kevin Truong
photo by Kevin Truong
Brendan, in his own words: “Apart from political debates or social acceptance issues, I’ve always felt that being gay doesn’t automatically carry any meaning or weight to it. I don’t believe that being gay defines me on any level except for being attracted to other men. For many gay men, being gay becomes a lifestyle – culturally, behaviorally, everything. While I certainly understand and appreciate how much of an influence being gay can have on someone’s life, especially when that influence is positive, it’s never really had much of an influence on me. My day to day to life is the same as it would be if I were straight, bisexual, asexual, etc. The only difference is that at the end of the day, I look forward to spending time with someone who happens to be a man.”
“Although I don’t “participate” in the gay community (in New York) in the typical ways, I definitely appreciate knowing there are millions of people who support LGBTQ rights and equality. Going to college in Brooklyn, where the environment towards LGBTQ people is primarily accepting, has been a very positive experience for me – I have made so many friends who either belong to or accept the community. I’ve thankfully never felt out of place or unwelcome for being gay.”
Christopher, in his own words: “I have always felt that since (being a gay man) is a challenge to the societal norm, that it was an opportunity to push myself further. I have always sought the same level of respect that my straight friends, colleagues and family members receive. For me its a quiet resistance. I set myself apart by doing well (in the ways that i can) and want to be respected for the quality of my character and not my sexual identity.”
“I feel that (the gay community) in New York is a bit of a two sided story, in the older more sleepy neighborhoods you find gay men who have a very different gay lifestyle, more subdued, more family oriented, more grounded by a supportive family. The “community” that most people associate with though is the more loud and proud type. I feel like (Brendan and I) fall more in the middle, while we are proud of our relationship, we choose to treat our sexuality in a more quiet manner. I don’t care much for clubs or hookups, so sometimes I feel like a minority.”