Tagged: kuala lumpur

William, Human Resources, Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia

photo by Kevin Truong
photo by Kevin Truong
photo by Kevin Truong
photo by Kevin Truong
photo by Kevin Truong
photo by Kevin Truong
photo by Kevin Truong
photo by Kevin Truong
photo by Kevin Truong
photo by Kevin Truong
photo by Kevin Truong
photo by Kevin Truong
photo by Kevin Truong
photo by Kevin Truong
photo by Kevin Truong
photo by Kevin Truong
William, in his own words: “To me being gay is all about finding yourself, as in self discovery and being true to yourself. It is being able to love who you want to love, and not feeling guilty about loving.

I suppose the main challenges in my life was me, myself and I. I was very critical of myself and have always had high expectations of myself. I was my worst enemy. And the greatest success was overcoming my fear of losing to myself. I used to think that I was not good enough, but now, I would tell myself that I am pretty awesome. I may not be perfect, but I know that I am worth it.

I personally knew I was gay when I was very young, about 9 or 10. I didn’t really know what being gay was all about then, but I knew I liked men more than women. I was more attracted to men than the opposite sex. As I was growing up, I dated girls mainly because I was always taught that way, and that was what society at large taught me; however, I was never really comfortable holding their hands or even being intimate with them. I’d always imagine what it would be like to be intimate with another man. Coming from a Mormon family, it was hard to admit that you are gay because they have expectations. Expectations of being married, having a family and being an active church member and doing the “so-called” right thing. I served my mission in Hong Kong as a missionary for the church, and being away from home for 2 years and always surrounded by men, it was tough, but I hung on to the belief that I would someday also get married with and have a family. But as the months went on and years came by, I realized that I am really gay and nothing in this world would change how I felt about men. So, at the age of 21, after my first junior year in college, I decided I wasn’t going to lie to myself hence I came out and told my parents and family that I am gay. Since then I have been happier and feel free.

I suppose the gay community in Kuala Lumpur is pretty similar to the ones around the world. Boys will be boys.

(Advice I’d give my younger self) Be true to yourself and never give up on yourself. Love is not easy, but it is always worth it. So, don’t give up on Love.”

A Note from Bryan, in Kuala Lumpur…

“Back in my younger days when idolizing male actors and singers who inspired me very much has always been an issue among my friends telling that i’m ‘so gay’ i slowly growing up as if i had some sort of illness for not liking any female entertainers. And talking to girls seemed to be much comfortable than talking to guys when sports aren’t your favorite topic at all and all they’ve talked was always about sports i kinda grew further from them. So was their sarcasm. When people always talking about a ‘guys night’, i would usually stay home neither do i receive any invitation. I grew accustomed to that routine. You’d have to be cool with it, nothing else you can do, right?

In my later age when i realized i developed an attraction towards other guys i started questioning myself a lot of things. You read a lot and you watch a lot online, and probably listen to a lot of advice as well as indecencies. For me, advice didn’t work the way how it should probably because i didn’t love myself enough. It was tough to get through that purgatorial phase it took me four years to get over that fact. By time you understand this one thing: as long as you behave good, do good, people will eventually have respect for you. Seek respect as an individual, not as a group. Trust me you’ll have no problem along the way. And people will stop looking at you as a homosexual but a respectable person. That’s how i got myself a peace state of mind.

Coming to your loved ones, frankly speaking i’m not fully out. Friends who mattered to me, they knew and they’re cool. Those who aren’t they simply do not need to know, why would that bother them? My family. I didn’t tell them. They’ve loved me my whole life; to have parents who tell you how much they love you and support you every day, well, mostly, i’m not ready just yet. I will tell them, until i’m ready, it’s a spiritual process and that gonna take some time. Understand that coming out should be done in the most comfortable moment especially for yourself. You don’t think it’s hard for me… When they talk about grandchildren, i probably can never get them a couple or even one, genetically. Not for them only, i’d like to be a dad too. Probably because of my parents, i’m kind of looking forward to parenthood. I love them all my heart.

Until everything is stable, you gonna find the right person and you’ll be happily married with couple of kids, at the most accepting and comfortable neighborhood. Until then, hang in there, love yourself and get through it, and your future is in your grasp. If i can, why can’t you?”

photo by Bryan
photo by Bryan