It’s funny, when you take as many pictures as I do, you develop certain attachments towards certain images. They’re like boys, some fall out of favor, while others forever hold my affection. Here are my current top twenty favorite images from the project, of the over two hundred men I’ve photographed so far.

#20. Andreas. New York City.

I bet it wouldn’t surprise you if I told you Andreas is a CEO. Or that he’s European. Or that he has the most perfect posture and table manners of any person I know.

#19. Justin. New York City.

Ok, so this may sound cheesy, but for me, I’m hoping this project gives some level of empowerment to the men I photograph. I’ve always thought the fact that these men are willing to let me share their portraits and their stories on the internet for all the world to see says a lot, considering most all of them have gone through a period of time where being gay was something they felt the need to hide. That’s why I like this picture of Justin. He only recently came out and I think he looks stoic. I love the light, I love the gaze, and I love the geometry of the buildings behind him.

#18. Edern. Paris.

I’ll admit, I just think Edern is handsome. I’m also infatuated with Paris, and I love the little relics in his room–the little orange robot, the folded clothing in the white cubby holes, the folds of his sheets…

#17. James. Panama City.

Panama City is hot, Panama City is humid, Panama City is a little rough and a little pretty. I think James embodies of all of these attributes in this picture.

#16. Michael. New York City.

Michael is really beautiful in this picture. I love the light on his chest, the patterns on the couch, the textures of the hangings on the wall, and all the color–the yellow in the wall, the orange in the couch, the purple in his top, the blue in his sock, the green in the ash-tray. And the tiny red flower in his hair.

#15. Joe. New York City.

Any guy without a shirt and a tattoo on his shoulder is sexy, but I actually think the light in this picture is even sexier. Of course, Joe is still very sexy.

#14. Jon. San Francisco.

Once again, it’s all about the light. And the TV. Normally, I hate TV’s in these portraits, but something about the big clunky television with the red and yellow candle on top of it I really dig. And I really love the shadow of Jon’s profile in the very bottom right corner of the picture.

#13. Tom. San Francisco.

So, Tom, made the list last time, but I actually had chosen another picture. But my affections have slowly been drawn to this one. I just love the way he’s holding the cat. I love the cat’s two outstretched front feet. And actually, the thing I love most about this picture is the slight rim of orange light on the top of Tom’s head.

#12. Thang. New York City.

I’m in love with Thang. I’m in love with his pink tie-died shirt, the pattern of the flowered sheet hanging on the wall, the laptop on the bar stool, the black crown on his head, the wire hanging down from the ceiling–everything about Thang–I love him, he is Brooklyn incarnate.

#11. Rami. New York City.

Smoking a cigarette in a trench coat in your New York City Chelsea apartment–Rami has so much swagger it kills me.

#10. Collin. Washington D.C.

Sometimes all you need is a beautiful face and beautiful light. I usually don’t take shots this close to the subject, but what can I say, I’m a sucker for green eyes. And Collin’s got them.

#09. Aunsha and Michael. New York City.

I’ve always just thought this was a beautiful moment between Aunsha and Michael. I love the gesture of their arms, their fingers interlocked, and I love how I asked them to do something natural and this is what they do. I guess I was just lucky to take a picture of two men very much in love.

#08. David. New York City.

David and his guitar–this guy oozes masculinity. But for me, it’s the red wall, the rim of yellow light on the side of his face, and the touch of green in the doorway that I’m really drawn to. And of course his big guitar.

#07. Nick. Portland.

Maybe it’s the red of his shirt, or the light spilling through the window, his posture, the way he’s sitting–I don’t know, I’ve just always been into this picture of Nick.

#06. Morgan. Baltimore.

Sometimes as a photographer you get lucky. This was actually the last shot of the shoot I did with Morgan. I was actually finished with the interview, had packed up, and went out the door of his apartment. And as I left I noticed the wallpaper in the hallway, and thought I had to get another shot. So I knocked again on his door and asked if I could take one more shot. And this was it. That one last shot.

#05. Stephen. New York City.

The next five pictures, to me, are really special. I love them, I’m attached to them, and I’m lucky to have been able to spend a moment in my life capturing them.

Stephen and his cat, there’s an embrace here that is iconic, and relatable, and a relationship and emotion here that you can actually read more from the cat’s face than from Stephen’s. My conversation with Stephen was a long one, him being one of those rare New York City gems whose own personal story is so intertwined with the story of the city itself. How often do we all forget that there was once a time when New York City lost an entire generation of gay men? Where friends and loved ones died within the span of six months, from some mystery illness that no one outside the lgbt community seemed to care about. My two hour conversation with Stephen recounted not only his own personal history but the history of the AIDS epidemic in New York City, and it’s a conversation I’m thankful to have had and something I’ll keep with me my entire life.

#04. Frank. New York City.

Frank, what can I say, I wrote about it last time, I think he’s great. And I’ll just repeat what I wrote last time. In all honesty, I don’t think this picture describes Frank well at all. Our conversation and his personality were very comfortable, and there’s a discomfort here I find in his face that may have been a reflection of the the 1/60th of the second with which the shutter of my camera opened and closed. But every time I look at this picture I can’t help but think of some painting of a large Odalisque because of the way he is reclining, which I think makes for an interesting commentary on an image of a man well over the age of seventy, living in a culture that obsessively covets youth.

#03. David. London.

Once again, whenever in my life I ever think about the Gay Men Project, David will always be one of the pictures I think of. I love him. For the longest time he was my favorite, it was just something in his gaze. In fact, for the longest time I wanted to know what he was in fact thinking when I clicked the shutter of my camera. Well, seven months after I took this picture he wrote me this letter:

“Dear Kevin, Happy New Year my love

I wanted to drop you a line to say how much I enjoyed meeting you and how honoured I was to be part of your amazing portfolio of wonderful inspiring gay men from around the globe.

The day you visited me was a very emotional day in my life . I thought I should share with you the tale behind this.

I had the previous evening learnt that my ex partner with whom i shared ten years of my life has lost his fight against cancer . We sadly were estranged and this news that someone I loved had fought such a tough battle without my knowing ripped me to the core.

We collect photos that remind us of the highs in our life but for me its important to document all emotions . For there is such beauty in this image even though its beneath a shroud of pain .

This helps to remind me to never let anything come between those we love , to never let anger or pain cloud our emotions . To never again loose contact with those I care about . You may cease to love in one capacity but can still offer love and support in another.

Thank You for helping me on this journey

Much love from across the pond

David xxx”

I’ll love this image. Forever, for my entire life.

#02. Canon Richard. London.

As anyone who has participated in the project knows, to me, as much as this project is about photographs, more important is the opportunity to sit down and have a one on one conversation with these men I’m photographing. In many respects, through these conversations, I’m trying to resolve something within myself with regards to my own identity as a gay man, as I continue the life-long journey of truly defining for me what it means to be gay.

And an issue I’ve often struggled with in this process is reconciling my personal faith with my identification as a gay man. I’ll always have a strong faith in God. I always have and I always will. When I was a child, I knelt at the foot of my bed and said the same prayer every night, until the age of thirteen. To this day, every time I ignore the plea of a homeless person on the New York City subway train, I feel like I’m making God upset. It’s just the way I think, it’s the way I work, it’s the way I tick.

My mom always says you’ll believe in God when you reach the lowest points in your life. Because you’ll need him. This coming from a woman who escaped Vietnam in a fishing boat, pregnant with me, and with my two older sisters. A woman who spent two weeks drifting in the South China Sea.

And so for me, it was always a source a conflict that all my lowest points were always intrinsically tied with my feelings of being gay. For me, the times I felt like I needed him most were times I felt like I couldn’t go to him.

As with everyone, my faith is very personal. And so when I had the opportunity to sit down with a gay Anglican priest when I was in London, I had a lot to say and a lot to ask.

Again, my conversation with Richard is one I’ll remember for the rest of my life. It was a private one, but I’m thankful I have this image that I can share with all of you.

#01. Andy and Mark, with their son Ben. Baltimore.

This picture embodies everything I want for my own life. And I didn’t know it was possible until I met Andy, Mark, and Ben. And for that I’ll be forever thankful.

Thanks to everyone who has been a part of and supported the Gay Men Project.