Category Archives: Manila, Philippines

Chris, Chief Executive Officer, Manila, Philippines

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

Chris, in his own words: “For me, being gay means being part of a wonderful and diverse community that seeks love and equality above all. It means being given a path of unique struggles that not only sharpens myself, but those that share the journey with me as well. To me, being gay means that I get to see the strength of my parents love for me in the midst of an unforgiving society. To me, being gay means that I get to look in the mirror and know, I am who I am because of what God has created and not by what society has chosen for me.

The biggest challenge was learning to accept myself. My greatest success has been overcoming it. Although I struggled with my sexuality while in the Marine Corps and my ministry in church, it all came secondary to the fact that I felt like I didn’t even know who I was as an individual.

I realized one day, as I watched advocates fighting for my right to be married at the time, that I wanted to be part of the fight. I muscled up the strength to contact my family via phone conversations and skype to tell them that I was gay. Everyone took it ok except for my dad. He didn’t speak to me for about a year afterwards. After I told my folks, I recorded a youtube video, in my military uniform, telling the rest of my friends, relatives, and ultimately the rest of the world, that I was gay. I did this because I didn’t want there to be any rumors to spread that I was gay. I wanted to control the conversation.My whole family now accepts me and even gave their blessings in my recent engagement.

I’m from the U.S. and only visiting (Manila). But from my observation, the gay community is still trying to find it’s identity as mainstream media has tried to define it for them already. Gay guys that are “out” are often dubbed as the flamboyant, comedic, and drag queen individuals of the community- even though that may not be necessarily true. And “discreet” guys are considered to be the masculine guys. There isn’t an equal representation of the diversity of the community in the public eye. There’s a lot of progress that needs to be done here in regards to lifting stereotypes and stigmas. The gay community seems to be accepted here, but only within a certain capacity. Be flamboyant and comedic and the Philippines will accept you. If you are masculine or want to get married, the Philippine society doesn’t know what to do with you and will most likely be met with resistance.

I would just tell (my younger self) what I tell myself today, just keep moving forward. I wouldn’t want to take away the struggles I went through in the past as I know I’m a stronger person today, for it.”

Ian, Human Resources Executive, Manila, Philippines

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

Adrian, in his own words: “Being gay is being who you are. It is about authenticity in everything that you do, unafraid of what people might think or feel about you. It is about freedom to choose who to love. It is about being resilient despite oppression from the society. It is about being an outlier and proud of it. It is about challenging the status quo and standing firm on being unique. It is about celebrating and valuing differences. It is about being a community.

Climbing the corporate ladder as a gay man is difficult for me. People tend to put labels and compare gay men with people who work in salons. That did not stop me for working hard. Every day, I try to outdo myself. I train and study really hard to get an advantage. I see my situation as opportunity to make a statement. Now at age 28, I am the youngest member of the senior management team in our company.

My ex-partner and I frequent the province to visit my parents, though I have introduced him to them as my best friend. When I received the new iPhone 4, I gave my old phone to my dad. So excited, I forgot to delete photos and messages. My parents discovered that my ex-partner was more than a friend. While washing the dishes, my mom went to me to confirm the relationship. She promised that she will pray for me every Wednesday and dedicate a novena for me to so that god will change my preference. They are not okay with my lifestyle. Since then, my relationship with them was not the same but I make the most of every opportunity to make them feel that I love them.

Manila has an active gay community. There are hotels, restaurants, bars, and clubs, who deliberately market themselves for LGBT. Despite religious issues, Filipinos are starting to accept the idea of homosexuality, largely due to media, gay celebrities and other contributing factors. LGBT-themed indie films have grown in numbers, thanks to the support of few establishments who advocates equality. Filipinos are used to gay stand-ups and comedians who perform on television and in bars for weekend comedy shows, which are almost always sold-out. Sad thing, however, I haven’t heard someone with power or influence who really came out of the closet and supported LGBT causes. While on the other hand, Quezon City recently passed an Anti-Discrimination Ordinance to ensure gender equality and promote LGBT rights.

(Advice I’d give my younger self) Take it one day at a time – don’t spend too much time wandering and searching for answers that only experience and encounters with people can provide. It’s always 101% or nothing. Give love, expect nothing in return, have no regrets. Love can always be renewed.”

Evan, Regional Director, Manila, Philippines

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

Evan, in his own words: “Being gay just means being attracted to people of the same sex. That’s it. Everything else — the circles we’re in, the places we go to, the products and services we use, the people we support — these are just incidental things that do not define the LGBT community. My personal journey though as part of the community has exposed me to the unique challenges here in the Philippines. Being gay drives me to shatter stereotypes and fight for rights that we deserve as citizens of the country.

Experiencing discrimination and not enjoying the same rights as straight people do is one of the big challenges I face as a gay man. Like getting married for example. Or being told that I’m bad.

Professionally, I am lucky to have a respectable position in a multinational tech company that supports equality and provides equal opportunities to the LGBT community.

At first I refused to identify as gay, partly because I found the whole label limiting. I had a long coming-out process as I struggled with feelings that I did not fully understand. I was scared to be pigeonholed and stereotyped. Eventually I started telling my friends about being gay. It became an open secret until it wasn’t much of a secret anymore.

Last year was a big breakthrough as a big brand here in the Philippines interviewed Filipino LGBT people, and I got to be part of it. I guess I could say that there was no way to hide it anymore. And it felt good that people treated me the same way after. My coming out fears, it turned out, were all in my head.

There’s still a struggle for acceptance and it drives a lot of people to fear identifying as LGBT. It’s a crazy catch-22 situation: people don’t identify as gay or lesbian or trans or bisexual because they don’t want to be discriminated and stereotyped, but LGBT people continue to be discriminated and stereotyped because we don’t see a lot of diversity. Different LGBT people remain invisible.

That’s changing though. We’re becoming more open and people are shattering misconceptions slowly. We’re fighting against the system, the false images painted by the media. Straight people are starting to realize we’re just like everyone else, that we have the same dreams, aspirations, wishes, and fears as everyone else. We just really want to be loved and to love.

(Advice I’d give my younger self) Believe in the love that people give you. Trust that those who truly love you will love you for being who you are and for being honest with your self. Be kinder and gentler to your self. You don’t have to fit in the images being projected on you. You can be who you are, and yeah, that’s awesome.”