Monthly Archives: December 2017

Pablo, Seoul, South Korea

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

Pablo, in his own words: “You know for Asian people to be a gay means everything will be difficult for you. Work, life, the societal relationships. But I’m proud of being gay, for me I have more freedom. I can face my real mind and to look for a true love. I think a couple doesn’t mean a boy and girl! Two boys sometimes is Better Hahahha .

(With regards to successes) Three years ago I decided to leave my country then went to Spain alone. But I didn’t know anything about Spain and the language. But I arrived there alone. I found all things and after 3 months I can write a text in Spanish and get points from people’s sentence. Hahahha.

(With regards to coming out) It isn’t a story. I just met my first boyfriend and I fell in love. Really really deeply, hahaha.

In seoul it isn’t really good for gay people to live. You have to keep it as secret. Because it will bring some troubles to you, but I never mind it. I just want to be myself.

Advice?? Ummmm just be yourself. Don’t think it’s weird. You should proud of your sexuality. Enjoy your life! ( this is from an American friend. I got many advice from him )”

Luis and Marco, Brussels, Belgium

Luis (left) and Marco (right), photo by Kevin Truong

Luis (left) and Marco (right), photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

Marco (left) and Luis (right)

Marco (left) and Luis (right)

Luis, in his own words: “L’homosexualité est l’attirance de de deux être de même sexe. Si on demande maintenant la définition de » gay » à un gay on en aura autant qu’il existe d’individu. Chacun vit sa sexualité, sa vie et ses sentiments de manière tout à individuelle. Certain parleront avec beaucoup d’aisance de leur sexualité. J’ai gardé une certaine pudeur par rapport au sexe. Je ne livre pas facilement et c’est pourquoi j’ai mis du temps à écrire ces quelques lignes Mon côté parfois extraverti masque une ancienne timidité. Le fait d’en parler aujourd’hui sur la toile fait partie de ma thérapie .

J’ai beaucoup de chance de vivre en Belgique qui a été avec les Pays Bas précurseur du mariage gay en Europe. Quand je vois les violences dans les dernières nouvelles que peuvent entrainer la légalisation du mariage gay en France, ça me fait peur. Le principe d’égalité et de fraternité reste à revoir par une partie de la société française qui se radicalise sur le sujet.

Je peux vivre librement à Bruxelles La communauté gay est pas extrêmement grande mais j’y trouve mon compte : je peux sortir en couple, se marier, aller boire un verre avec mes amis gays et pour les célibataires, il y a tout ce qu’il faut. La liberté est cependant limitée à certaines zones. Il faut faire attention à ne pas s’afficher sous peine de violences verbales ou physiques. Les extrémistes religieux sont très puissants dans certains quartiers.

J’ai mis beaucoup temps à faire mon coming out. Quand j’étais jeune, je n’avais pas beaucoup de référents homos ou des icônes gay dans les médias. Les choses ont bien changés aujourd’hui. Ca a pris des années avant de l’annoncer à mes amis, puis à mon entourage professionnel, enfin ma famille. Tour s’est déroulé de manière progressive et lente. Je suis originaire de la Méditerranée et il faut toujours plus de temps pour le coming out. Mon père n’a jamais accepté mon coming out.

J’ai l’impression de devoir faire tout le temps mon coming out avec les gens qui sont dans mon chemin. Mes amis me diront que ça se voit de loin. On aura toujours à faire à des personnes qui mettent des ornières à leurs yeux par rapport à l’homosexualité. Elles se cachent d’une réalité qui est présente depuis la nuit des temps. Pourquoi devoir toujours se justifier ou mentir sur sa personnalité ? Plus je vieillis et moins j’use de politesse par rapport à ma sexualité.”

In English:

“Homosexuality is the attraction between two of the same sex. It’s not a question of defining “gay” but rather the individual. Everyone lives his sexuality, his life and his feelings in an entirely individual way. Some speak very fluently about their sexuality. I kept a certain modesty about sex. I do not easily share and that’s why I took time to write these few lines. My extroverted side sometimes masks a former shyness. The fact that I write this today is part of my therapy.

I am very lucky to live in Belgium, which with the Netherlands was the precursor for gay marriage in Europe. When I saw violence after the legalization of gay marriage in France, it scared me. The principles of equality and fraternity remain to fight the part of the French population that is radicalized on the subject.

I can live freely in Brussels. The gay community is not very big but I found one: I can go out together, get married, have a drink with my gay friends and singles, there is everything that is necessary. Freedom is limited to certain areas. I am careful not to appear under penalty of verbal or physical violence. Religious extremists are very powerful in certain areas.

I put a lot time into my coming out. When I was young, I did not have many gay references or gay icons in the media. Things have changed since. It took years before announcing to my friends and to my professional colleagues, and then finally my family. This took place gradually and slowly. I am from the Mediterranean and it takes more and more time for coming out. My father never accepted my coming out.

I feel like I have come out all the time with people who are in my way. My friends tell me that it is visible from afar. We always have to deal with people who put ruts in their eyes with regards to homosexuality. They hide a reality that has been present since the dawn of time. Why should I always have to justify or lie about this part of myself? The older I get the less I am polite over my sexuality.”

Marco, in his own words: “Dear Kevin, I think all is in the perception of happiness.

Eltern sollten wissen, dass ihre schwulen Söhne glücklich sein können, so wie sie sind, weil sie so sind. Das dies seine Zeit braucht, habe ich unterschätzt; ich hatte damals geglaubt, es wäre genug, wenn ich meinen Eltern zeigte, dass ich glücklich verliebt war. Sie dachten aber zuerst, dass dies meine Selbsttäuschung sei, und sie mich vor meinem Unglück bewahren müssten. Mit der Zeit haben wir dann alle gelernt – dass sich Mut auszahlt, für sie und für mich.

Wenn ich etwas bedauere, dann dass ich nicht früher entspannter sein konnte: als ich noch mit mir haderte, und keine Menschen aus Fleisch und Blut, sondern nur Figuren aus Romanen, Filmen und Skandalgeschichten der Presse als unmögliche Vorbilder kannte. Hätte ich so etwas wie diesen Blog gefunden, wäre mir vieles leichter gefallen. Wenn er auch nur einigen Zweifelnden wo auch immer auf der Welt das Leben einfacher macht, ist er ein fantastisches Geschenk Kevins an die, die noch heranwachsen.”

In English:

“Parents should know that their gay sons can be happy the way they are because they are so. That this takes time I underestimated; I had at before believed it would be enough if I showed my parents that I was happy and in love. However, they thought at first that I was self-deceiving myself, and that they would protect me from my misfortune. Over time, we have all learned then – that takes courage for them and for me.

If I regret something, it is that I could not be more relaxed earlier: when I knew of only myself, and knew not of other men in the flesh, but only characters from novels, movies and scandals from the press it made it impossible to find role models. If I had found such a thing as this blog, I would have likely had an easier time. If it is possible to make the lives of those who doubt in themselves easier, this is a fantastic gift to those who are still growing.”

Paul, Photographer, Lima, Peru

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

Paul, in his own words: “What does being gay mean to you?

No estoy muy seguro de esto, ósea sé que soy gay porque es la palabra que define mi atracción por los chicos pero más allá de eso me identifico como un ser humano en busca de la igualdad para todos

Uno de los problemas con el que lidio continuamente es la desaprobación de la sociedad que me rodea, vivo en un país represivo y con miedo al cambio que prefiere repetir una historia mil veces antes que intentar hacer algo distinto.
Podría decir que el desafío más fuerte que tengo ahora mismo es conmigo. 
He dejado que muchxs hagan la lucha por mí, lucha por mis derechos, lucha por mi reconocimiento como persona. El año pasado sufrí un ataque de homofobia, fui golpeado solo por defenderme de una burla por usar pantalones apretados, en su momento lo deje pasar pensé que era algo que tenía que suceder de todas maneras solo por mostrarme como quiero. 
Luego me di cuenta que es el pensamiento más tonto que pude haber tenido ¿cómo pensar que ser golpeado es natural, solo por ser homosexual? Cuando vi lo absurdo que era creer esto, decidí hacer un cambio. 
Ahora cada vez que puedo trato de ayudar en algo con esta lucha, cuando alguien suelta un comentario tonto sobre la homosexualidad o hace algún chiste sobre ello, trato de hacer que entienda que no es un tema que se puede tomar a la ligera, la homosexualidad es parte importante de alguien más.

La comunidad gay es muy diversa como todo grupo, hay gente que es más activista, gente que lucha solo cuando les afecta de manera personal y gente que no se identifica con la comunidad. Imagino que todo eso está bien ya es muy personal como uno decide compartir con los demás. Lo que si aún me parece mala onda es cuando algunos homosexuales dan la espalda a otros solo por no compartir un mismo status o por no tener un parecido físico a ellos sean marrones o blancos. 
 ¿Si todos en el fondo sabemos que somos lo mismo porque no ayudarnos?

Siempre he sabido que soy homosexual, hasta cuando no sabía que existía una palabra con la que me pueda definir, sabía que soy gay. 
Desde niño las personas han asociado mi feminidad con mi orientación sexual, por lo tanto nunca tuve que salir oficialmente del closet, hasta los 16 que fue cuando termine el colegio y se lo dije a mi mama, por que sentí que era algo que necesitaba decirlo con todas sus palabras. Fue algo complicado porque ella ya me había preguntado sobre mis gustos cuando tenía 14, yo conteste de manera muy general sin una afirmación o una negación. Mi papa no toca mucho el tema por temor a decir algo que me incomode pero cada vez que yo tengo la oportunidad de compartir algo con él lo hago, porque quiero enseñarle que no tener miedo de lo que su hijo es.
Igual aun a veces se me complica cuando tengo que aclarar mi orientación sexual con ciertas personas, sobre todo con las mayores porque están cerrados en una sola idea del homosexualismo, entonces hacerles comprender algo nuevo es medio difícil pero ahí voy, haciendo lo que está en mis manos para ayudar con la causa.

El consejo que me daría a mí mismo, es que no existe una manera correcta de hacer las cosas, solo tú puedes hacer que el camino que estas tomando sea el mejor para ti. Que disfrute el momento porque no todos los años tendrá 22 para hacer las cosas que solo puedes hacer a los 22.”

In English:

“What does being gay mean to you?

I’m not sure about this, I know I’m gay because it is the word that defines my attraction to guys, but beyond that I identify myself as a human being in search of equality for all.

One of the problems with continually feeling the disapproval of the society around me, I live in a repressive country that is afraid of change and prefers to repeat a story a thousand times rather than trying to do something different.

I would say that the strongest challenge I have right now is me. I let many thing make me fight, fight for my rights and my struggle for recognition as a person. Last year I suffered a bout of homophobia, I was beaten and mocked and made to defend myself simply for wearing tight pants, at the time I thought it was something that would have had to happen anyway. Then I realized that’s the dumbest thing I could have been thinking, why should I be beaten naturally, just for being gay? When I saw how absurd it was to believe this, I decided to make a change. Now whenever I can I try to help in this fight, when someone drops a silly comment about homosexuality or makes a joke about it, I try to understand that it is not an issue that can be taken lightly, homosexuality is an important part of somebody else.

The gay community (in Lima) is as diverse as any group, there are people who are more activist, people who struggle only when it affects them personally and people who do not identify with the community. I guess being gay is very personal and one can decide whether or not to share it with others. What I think is not cool is when some gay individuals criticize others just for not sharing the same status or not having a physical resemblance to them, for being brown or white. Everyone deep down knows we are the same.

I’ve always knew I was gay, even before I knew there was a word that could define me I knew that I am gay. Since childhood people have associated my femininity with my sexual orientation, so I never had to officially come out until around 16 when I finished school and I told my mom that I felt it was something I needed to say. It was tricky because she had asked me about my interests when I was 14, I answered very generally without an affirmation or denial. My dad does not play much with the issue for fear of saying something that bothers me but whenever I have the opportunity I share something with him about what I do, because I want to teach him not to be afraid of what his child is. Sometimes it troubles me when I have to clear my sexual orientation with certain people, especially the elderly because they are stuck on one idea of homosexuality. I hope to make them understand something new is kind of hard but there I go, doing what is in my hands to help with the cause.

The advice I would give myself is that there is no right way to do things, only you can make the path you’re taking, and decide what is best for you. Enjoy the moment because not everyone has 22 years to do things as you have had.”