Monthly Archives: March 2015

Pablo, Student, Seoul, South Korea

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

Pablo, in his own words: “You know for Asian people to be a gay means everything will be difficult for you. Work, life, the societal relationships. But I’m proud of being gay, for me I have more freedom. I can face my real mind and to look for a true love. I think a couple doesn’t mean a boy and girl! Two boys sometimes is Better Hahahha .

(With regards to successes) Three years ago I decided to leave my country then went to Spain alone. But I didn’t know anything about Spain and the language. But I arrived there alone. I found all things and after 3 months I can write a text in Spanish and get points from people’s sentence. Hahahha.

(With regards to coming out) It isn’t a story. I just met my first boyfriend and I fell in love. Really really deeply, hahaha.

In seoul it isn’t really good for gay people to live. You have to keep it as secret. Because it will bring some troubles to you, but I never mind it. I just want to be myself.

Advice?? Ummmm just be yourself. Don’t think it’s weird. You should proud of your sexuality. Enjoy your life! ( this is from an American friend. I got many advice from him )”

The Hon Michael Kirby, Former Justice of the High Court of Australia, Sydney, Australia

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong


photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

Michael, in his own words: “I would describe (the LGTBI community in Australia) as still in its infancy. It is emerging, and it is becoming more assertive of rights. But it isn’t all that long ago when in Australia people were expected to be thoroughly ashamed of themselves for being LGBTIQ and when I was growing up that was what was expected. We lived in a world of don’t ask don’t tell. But increasingly in recent years through the action of some courageous people, young people are standing up and some old fogies are beginning to do that too. So it is a new idea whose time has come. It is developing and it will continue to develop in Australia, and it will go on doing so until we have complete equality because inequality is based upon irrational attitudes and non-scientific approach.

Marriage equality is one of those symbolic things that is significant and I certainly believe in that being made available, it is not available at the moment in Australia. Marriage in Australia unlike the United States is governed by the Federal Constitution and is a Federal power. The Federal Legislation not only does not provide for marriage equality, it forbids any recognition of marriage equality by any court or any state legislature in Australia. This was something that we copied from the United States, in the so called DOMA, the Defense of Marriage Act in 2004. And until the Federal Parliament changes the law we won’t have equality in this country. However, though it is an important symbol, people can get by without being married. Many people nowadays, including younger straight people don’t get married, and in my own case with my partner Johann, we’ve been together for 46 years and it’s getting a little late in the day for our confetti and marriage celebrations. Indeed, we’re not absolutely certain that if marriage were available we would get married. In some ways that is mimicking an institution of straight society and we don’t feel the need for it, personally, but we certainly believe it should be there for those citizens who want it. In the mean time, there’s a lot of other things that need to be addressed in Australia, for example the exceptions from anti-discrimination law, in favor of religious groups, which allows schools with public funds to be established in Australia, or maintained in Australia, by religious organizations, Christian and non-Christian to discriminate against LGTIQ students.

I think the next generation should think of what it can give back to straight society. I do think that on a whole, LBTIQ people have a more realistic attitude towards human sexuality and human expression and experience. And instead of simply going along imitating straight relationships, I think it may be that in the future, young gay people will have lessons to teach straight people. The notion, for example, that you should break up a relationship of many years, simply because somebody has had a sexual experience with another person is something that would strike most gay people as irrational. And therefore, on the whole, young gay people have a more realist attitude. The idea of cheating on somebody, is an idea that has its foundation in ownership, and that isn’t a really stable basis on which to build a life experience.

Time Magazine found that long term living together is good for people’s health. And as you grow older, it’s even better for your health, to have somebody who cares whether you live or die. And the notion of destroying that opportunity on the basis of cheating, is a very old fashioned and rather patriarchal attitude towards sexual relationships. So I think instead of asking what straight society will do for us, I think it’s important for LGBTI, people to think of what they can do for straight society. By example, by research, by thinking, by expression. And that is really picking up President Kennedy’s statement in his inaugural address. “Ask not what America can do for me, but what I can do for America.” Well, LGBTI people should ask not what straight people in the world can do for them, but what they can do for straights.

I was more open about my sexual orientation as I got older. And then HIV AIDS came along and I became involved in both local activities and national activities concerned with the epidemic. I was invited by a very great international civil servant, Jonathan Mann, who was the head of the original global program on AIDS of the World Health Organization, to get involved in the global commission on AIDS, and so increasingly I was engaged in activities for the world wide response to HIV and AIDS. In Australia we did better in this respect than the United States and most other countries. We did that because we had a federal Minister for Health who later turned out to be bisexual, and we had an opposition spokesman on health who was a professor of public health, and therefore just by a chance confluence of these two men, we did better. I got involved in that, that was a kind of code language for my sexual orientation. And most people who were watching understood that. And that was in the 1980s, 1986 and thereafter, but my exact declaration of my sexual orientation came in the 1990s, and at that stage it seemed a natural and proper thing to do.

(To any young person reading the blog) I would say to do what can safely be done to uphold science, to uphold the principles of kindness to one another. And to be honest. It’s a terrible thing in a young person to require them to be dishonest, especially to their parents and to their siblings, and to their immediate family and neighbors and work colleagues. And basically we all know it originates not in some scientific basis, but in the fact that some people get upset if they hear the truth. The truth is that a small proportion of people have a sexual orientation towards a romantic sexual interrelationship with people of the same gender. Well, get over it. It’s important that young people, especially, should try as far as they safely can to be honest and to change the world. Because until now, LGBTIQ people have basically been conspiring in their own disadvantage and second class status by going along with the pretense. The pretense has to finish. When it finishes, we’ll get back to a scientific reality, that this small proportion exists. And we in the world own a great deal to Dr. Kinsey, Alfred Kinsey, of Indiana University in the United States who did the research on sexual orientation in the 1940s and 50s and his publications began the moves to change things and those moves will keep happening until it has been changed throughout the world. Medieval demons in the minds of some religious people, mainly men, will ultimately have to give way to scientific truth.

I’ve been very lucky in my life to have wonderful parents, wonderful siblings, a marvelous grandmother, and fantastic teachers, excellent education opportunities, considerable professional success, and that is the all of me, my sexual orientation is just a part of me, just as in a successful professional lawyer and judge you wouldn’t start a conversation by asking about their sexual orientation. It would be irrelevant and often regarded as impertinent. However, I hope in the area of LGBT issues I will be remembered as somebody who made it a little easier for younger people growing up to be truthful about their sexual orientation and gender identity.”

Javier, Santiago, Chile

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong


Javier, in his own words: “Para mi ser gay significa aportar y colaborar a generar un cambio positivo en la sociedad con respecto a lo que creen y piensan de la comunidad LGTB. El poder demostrarle al resto que uno es feliz, genera un progreso en su vida y puede llevar una vida completamente normal es gratificación suficiente para no sentir vergüenza de mis preferencias, decirlas sin ningún problema y por sobre todo, poder mostrar quien realmente soy. La comunidad LGTB está regida por muchos estereotipos que son los mas evidentes ante la sociedad y, la mayoría de esta, solo aprecia este lado de la comunidad (Muchas veces crea rechazo). Para mi es gratificante poder mostrar el otro lado, ese lado donde uno siendo gay nadie espera que lo seas ya que rompes con los estereotipos existentes.

Uno de mis mayores desafíos fue poder aceptar e integrar a la comunidad LGTB. No lograba entender como hombres podían ser tan femeninos o mujeres tan masculinas, al punto que no me involucraba con ninguno de ellos. Me di cuenta que esto estaba mal porque es un tipo de discriminación, ya que si yo, siendo gay, discriminaba a otras personas gay, ¿Cómo podía esperar un cambio inclusivo en la sociedad? ¿Cómo esperaba que me aceptaran a mi?, y si bien yo me siento muy bien siendo como soy, el resto lo es siendo como ellos quieren ser. Me di cuenta que el respeto por los demás es muy importante y uno no puede pretender que el resto de las personas sea como uno quiere que sean. Fue muy difícil cambiar el “switch” mental por como me criaron.

Al venir de una familia muy cristiana y de mormones, otro de los grandes desafíos fue hacerles cambiar el “switch” a mi familia que ser gay es malo. Ellos pensaban que yo al ser gay iba camino a la autodestrucción y que era algo como un “castigo divino”. Fue cuando tome la decisión de demostrarles todo lo contrario y la mejor forma de hacerlo fue mostrandoles lo feliz que soy y lo bien que me hace. Entendí que el miedo y la ignorancia sobre el tema hace que el resto actué de forma no muy agradable y comprensiva. Actualmente hay muchos mitos sobre el tema.

Actualmente la comunidad LGTB en Santiago va tomando mayor participación en actividades y en la sociedad. Me es muy grato ver como hay una evolución en el pensamiento colectivo, generado por la comunidad. Antiguamente era casi un tema tabú, ahora hay leyes que mejoran nuestras condiciones sociales, jurídicas (es casi como estar casados) y nos protegen en caso de discriminación. Ahora tu puedes ver por la calle, o en lugares públicos, parejas del mismo sexo tomados de la mano y dándose un beso confidente. Esto es un gran paso para Chile! Se que nos falta mucho para llegar a países desarrollados donde hay mejores leyes y mucha mas confianza, pero se que de a poco vamos hacia allá, juntos vamos logrando y exigiendo que así sea.

En este momento trabajo en Groupon LatAm y la empresa tiene una excelente iniciativa. Se trata de un grupo interno que se llama Pride Latino (en Instagram: https://instagr.in/u/grouponchile #PrideLatino), donde la propuesta que busca el grupo junto con la empresa es materializar la diversidad con acciones concretas en la oficina. Donde con celebración, progreso, orgullo, amor y comunidad todos se puedan sentir representados e incluidos.

Mi historia de como salí del closet, no fue la mejor. Para mi era un mundo completamente nuevo y desconocido, y por miedo a lo desconocido lo oculte a todo el mundo, comencé a pololear y a hacer mi vida como si nunca nadie lo iba a descubrir. De repente mi familia se entera por una carta que descuidadamente deje en mi habitación y ellos no lo tomaron de la mejor forma, ya que en parte les había mentido. Fue una situación muy impactante y aún la recuerdo como si fuera ayer. Me echaron de la casa y me fui a vivir con un amigo. No los culpo ni les guardo rencor ya que actuaron como cualquiera lo hubiera hecho con miedo y desconocimiento. Luego de todo lo sucedido me di cuenta que hubiera sido mucho mejor si hubiera tenido la confianza suficiente para haberles contado. Luego de unos meses lo conversamos tranquilamente y entendieron que estaba muy bien, entendieron que si estaba tan bien no era malo y me apoyaron completamente. Ahora tengo la confianza suficiente para poder llevar a alguien y presentarlo a
mi familia. Fue una evolución necesaria que llevo años de trabajo y por sobre todo, se que tengo una familia maravillosa que me apoya y los amo.

El mejor consejo que le puedo dar a la gente joven es que no tengan miedo en mostrar quien realmente son y por sobre todo respeten para que sean respetados. Soy un convencido de que la familia es lo mas importante que tenemos y con el trabajo suficiente pueden contar con ellos siempre. Si son gay y nadie lo sabe, no se lo guarden para ustedes mismos, busquen apoyo en alguien de confianza, ya que a nadie le hace bien guardar un secreto tan grande, independiente de tu condición sexual.”

In English:

“For me being gay means to contribute and collaborate to create positive change in society regarding what society believes and thinks of the LGBT community. Being able to show the rest of the world that one is happy, enables progress in life and leading a normal life is rewarding enough, not to feel shame for my preferences, to say to everyone without any problems and above all, to show who I really am. The LGBT community is governed by many stereotypes that are most evident in society and many see this side of the community (and often creates rejection). For me it is gratifying to show the other side, that side or being gay that nobody expects, helping to break existing stereotypes.
 
One of my biggest challenges was to accept and integrate into the LGBT community. I could not understand how men could be as female as a male or female, to the point that I did not involve myself with any of them. I realized that this was wrong because it is a form of discrimination, because if I, being gay, discriminated against other gay people, how could I expect an inclusive society to change? How do you expect me to accept myself? And while I feel great being as I am, the rest are still as they want to be. I realized that respect for others is very important and one can not expect other people to be how you want them to be. It was very difficult to change the mind “switch” that I was raised with.

Coming from a very Christian family and Mormons, one of the biggest challenges was to make them change the “switch” of my family that being gay is bad. They thought I was going to go down a gay road to self-destruction and that was something like a “divine punishment”. I decided to prove the opposite and the best way is showing them how happy I am and what good it does for me. I understood that fear and ignorance on the subject makes the rest act not very nice and in a comprehensive manner. Currently there are many myths about it.
 
Currently the LGBT community in Santiago is taking greater participation in activities and in society. I am pleased to see that there is an evolution in collective thinking, generated by the community. Formerly it was almost a taboo subject, there are now laws to improve our social, legal (it’s almost like being married) and protect us in case of discrimination. Now you can see down the street or in public places, same-sex couples holding hands and giving a confident kiss. This is a big step for Chile! We still lack a lot to reach the status of developed countries with better laws and a lot more confidence, but we are slowly getting there, together we are achieving and demanding much.

I currently work at Groupon LatAm and the company has an excellent initiative. This is an internal group called Latino Pride (in Instagram: https://instagr.in/u/grouponchile #PrideLatino), where the proposals seeking the group along with the company’s diversity materialize in the concrete actions office. This is a place to celebrate, progress, feel proud, love and have community and everyone can feel represented and included.
 
My story of how I left the closet, was not the best. To me it was a completely new and unknown world, and a fear of the unknown that was hidden from everyone, I started hiding and making my life as if nobody was ever going to find it. Suddenly my whole family found a letter carelessly left in my room and they did not take it the best. It was a shocking situation and I still remember it like it was yesterday. I got kicked out of the house and went to live with a friend. I do not blame or hold grudges because they acted as anyone would have done with fear and ignorance. After everything that happened I realized that it would have been much better if I had enough confidence to have told them. After a few months we talked quietly and understood each other very well. Now I have the confidence to take someone and present it to
my family. It was a necessary evolution that took years of work and above all, I have a wonderful family that supports me and I love them.
 
The best advice I can give to young people is to not be afraid to show who you really are and above all respect to be respected. I am convinced that the family is the most important thing I have and with enough work I can have them forever. If you are gay and nobody knows, do not keep it to yourselves, seek support from someone you trust, because no one benefits from keeping a secret of your sexual condition.”