Monthly Archives: February 2015

Dave, Cashier, Jakarta, Indonesia

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

Dave, in his own words: “. (Being gay means) being my own self. I mean, since I was a little boy, I was already attracted physically with other boys and I think it’s natural. Because I don’t know what we call it. When I grew up and became a teenager, that feeling became stronger, and never changed. I’m still attracted physically (and sometimes sexually) with men. There’s no force, no pretending, it flew naturally, came from my feeling. I can’t deny it. After I went to college, I understood about homosexuality. I’m a part of it. Being a gay, man (biologically has a penis) who is attracted physically and sexually to another man. But, sometimes, I think that I’m in a wrong body, a female in a male body. Hahahahaa.. So, I like to make over myself and become a female (crossdresser)

The biggest challenge in my life has been conservative people. They won’t accept us just like we are. We live in a Muslim (most of the religion) country with a lots of norms and rules that came from the conservative points of view.

(With regards to coming out) Actually I’ve already come out since I was a little boy. I told my friend (a boy) that I liked another boy too. In that time, I also acted like a girl, liked to play with girl’s stuff, including wearing my mom’s dress. And I enjoyed it. So, I guess, my parents already knew about it. They never asked me but, I can saw it from their attitude, they accepted me. Maybe because I got good achievements at school and I was the one of my family who went to college. My brother used go against me, but now, he already accept me just like I used to be now.

There is lots of gay community in Jakarta. You can find them everywhere, but not the discreet groups. Usually, the discreet ones, use social media to make communications, and make appointments to meet each other in a secret place too (I mean maybe in a hotel, rented room, etc) not in a public areas. There’s still a gap between the sissy ones with the manly ones (straight acting), the high end with the low end.

(Advice I’d give my younger self) Being gay isn’t wrong. It’s not a sin. It’s natural. It comes from your feelings and heart. So, just accept yourself. Just being yourself, not pretending to be someone else. You are not alone.”

Julian, Sociologist, Lima, Peru

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin TRuong

photo by Kevin TRuong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

Julian, in his own words: “Ser gay significa para mi tener la convicción de que cada uno es libre de amar y querer a una persona de su mismo sexo. Decir que soy gay es un reto a las posibilidades de amor que la sociedad impone.

Aceptar mi sexualidad ha sido uno de los más grandes retos que he tenido. Antes era horrible como mi mente trabajaba en que cosas decir y que hacía o que no para que la gente no lo note. Era agotador y siempre me sentía intranquilo. En mi hogar me veían molesto siempre y no sabían por qué y yo tampoco sentía que podía decirlo. Luego de aceptar quien soy todo comenzó a mejorar y ahora siento que las relaciones que tengo con los demás son más honestas que antes.

La comunidad gay en Lima es aún pequeña, no hay mucha visibilidad pero creo que se están abriendo grandes oportunidades y avances que la gente está consiguiendo. Creo que de aca a unos años seremos más fuertes y con capacidad de presión para generar políticas públicas hacia la población y una sociedad sin discriminación.

Yo sabía que me gustaban los hombres desde pequeño y en secundaria comenzaron a sospechar pero la reacción de ellos no fue nada bueno así que lo negué. Fue recién en el verano del 2009 gracias al apoyo de mis amigos que les dije que era, fue todo un proceso y sigue siendo. Mi madre hace unos meses me dijo “lo único que quiero es que seas feliz”, ella tiene miedo de cómo la gente me pueda tratar en el futuro, por eso también es que decidí luchar por mis derechos, para demostrarle que su deseo y el mío son posibles.

Le diría que ser gay no es el fin del mundo, que nadie me va a castigar, es un camino duro pero aceptarse es lo mejor que te puede pasar y que hay gente que te seguirá queriendo incluso aún más por ser honesto contigo mismo.”

In English:

Being gay means to me to have the conviction that everyone is free to love and love a person of the same sex. To say that I’m gay is a challenge to the possibilities of love that society imposes.

Accepting my sexuality has been one of the biggest challenges I’ve ever had. Before it was horrible as my mind worked about how to say things or act for people not to notice my sexuality. It was exhausting and I always felt uneasy. At home I always looked annoyed and people did not know why and I felt that I could not say what was happening. After accepting who I am everything started to improve and now I feel that I have more honest relationships with others than before.

The gay community in Lima is still small, there is not much visibility but I think they are opening great opportunities and developments for people to receive. I think from here in a few years we will be stronger and able to pressure to generate public policies towards the population and have a society without discrimination.

I knew I liked men since childhood but my parents began to suspect when I was 16 but their reaction was not good so I refused to accept my sexual orientation. It was not until the summer of 2009 thanks to the support of my friends that I told to my parents, it was a process and remains so. My mother a few months ago said “all I want is your happiness” she is afraid of how people can treat me in the future, so I also decided to fight for my rights, to demonstrate her desires and mine are possible.

(To my younger self) I would say that being gay is not the end of the world, no one is going to punish you, it’s a hard road but accepting it is the best that can happen and there are people who still love you even more for being honest with yourself.”

Chris, Chief Executive Officer, Manila, Philippines

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

photo by Kevin Truong

Chris, in his own words: “For me, being gay means being part of a wonderful and diverse community that seeks love and equality above all. It means being given a path of unique struggles that not only sharpens myself, but those that share the journey with me as well. To me, being gay means that I get to see the strength of my parents love for me in the midst of an unforgiving society. To me, being gay means that I get to look in the mirror and know, I am who I am because of what God has created and not by what society has chosen for me.

The biggest challenge was learning to accept myself. My greatest success has been overcoming it. Although I struggled with my sexuality while in the Marine Corps and my ministry in church, it all came secondary to the fact that I felt like I didn’t even know who I was as an individual.

I realized one day, as I watched advocates fighting for my right to be married at the time, that I wanted to be part of the fight. I muscled up the strength to contact my family via phone conversations and skype to tell them that I was gay. Everyone took it ok except for my dad. He didn’t speak to me for about a year afterwards. After I told my folks, I recorded a youtube video, in my military uniform, telling the rest of my friends, relatives, and ultimately the rest of the world, that I was gay. I did this because I didn’t want there to be any rumors to spread that I was gay. I wanted to control the conversation.My whole family now accepts me and even gave their blessings in my recent engagement.

I’m from the U.S. and only visiting (Manila). But from my observation, the gay community is still trying to find it’s identity as mainstream media has tried to define it for them already. Gay guys that are “out” are often dubbed as the flamboyant, comedic, and drag queen individuals of the community- even though that may not be necessarily true. And “discreet” guys are considered to be the masculine guys. There isn’t an equal representation of the diversity of the community in the public eye. There’s a lot of progress that needs to be done here in regards to lifting stereotypes and stigmas. The gay community seems to be accepted here, but only within a certain capacity. Be flamboyant and comedic and the Philippines will accept you. If you are masculine or want to get married, the Philippine society doesn’t know what to do with you and will most likely be met with resistance.

I would just tell (my younger self) what I tell myself today, just keep moving forward. I wouldn’t want to take away the struggles I went through in the past as I know I’m a stronger person today, for it.”