Randy, in his own words: “Being gay means Im really no different than any other human other than what i may or may not do in the bedroom. I make my bed, wash my clothes, take out the trash, pay my bills, go to the movies… just like any one else would.
My challenges in life have usually revolved around being patient; being patient w people, events, and circumstances. Ive had numerous successes throughout my life, my career and in my personal and professional relationships.
There is no gay community per say here in Portland. The GLBTQ citizens is interspersed throughout the many communities, the burbs and farmlands here. We are woven as threads into the colorful fabric of each and every community.
(With regards to coming out ) When I was 11 y/o I had made fast friends with a student from Japan. He taught me how to masturbate, and one day I had written a letter to my j/o buddy. I had intended to mail it to him, but my father found it first. He was not having any part of my being involved with a man. I was told it was just a phase I was going through and to forget about it, and never to see him again. For the next 3 years I would do just that. In my 20s, I didn’t feel a need to “come out”, I just assumed everyone knew that I was gay because I never had girlfriends; never brought a girl to family gatherings. When I did tell certain straight male friends I was gay, they dropped my like a lead anvil. Its sad to think that I was “ok” with them, when hanging out and getting stoned, but my sexuality would make them extremely uncomfortable, even without discussing sex, or trying to “convert them”. LOL
I would tell my younger self to remember… God made you in His image and likeness, and that he does not make junk! You are your father’s son, and a gift unto this world, your family, friends and the community in which you will live. But most importantly, you DO make a difference in people’s lives. Be kind to yourself when you feel less than, and embrace the Allness of your whole self. Not everyone will like you, but thats not important, what is important is that YOU like you, and to love yourself wholly and unconditionally.”