A Note From Robert…

“I think your project is awesome!

My story is not unique. I’m was not different than another teens in the south in the 70’s, afraid of the ramifications of coming out, so I didn’t. I suppressed it for 30 years. I did what “normal” men do. Go to college, meet a girl, marry and have children.

I was going to go to my grave as a straight husband, father and friend. The turning point came 4 years ago. I didn’t come out then but because of the events is where I am today. I came out to my therapist. I was seeing him because of depression, not because I was gay living a lie. It was for what I had done, the people I hurt including my wife, son and community. I didn’t kill anyone, I am not a pedophile. My crime was white collar. My concession came out by accident, to be truthful to at least one person.

That same day I told my wife, she was not upset, mad, angry, in fact she had always suspected. We are getting divorced, but will always be friends. In fact those I told, very, very few, were not surprised. Wow, here I thought I covered it up so well. Those I’ve told are accepting. However, keep it to yourself, live the life, but be discreet. I work in a Catholic school, so you can only imagine how that would go. In fact my Priest, very accepting, has issues with the church and homosexuality, said when I told him, as a Priest, not a boss, that there was a moral clause, in the church that I could be fired, for not being gay, but acting on it. As long as he was the priest he would not fire me.

My family was less accepting and in fact, “I will burn in hell” I believe were the exact words.

Unfortunately I need this job, I want to tell the world.

My story is what it is and I wanted to share with someone.

I love your project and will continue to follow. Best of luck and thank you.”

One comment

  1. Jem

    Yes, Robert, I love this project of Kevin’s too. It is encouraging to know so many other people struggling because they gay, and so many succeeding in spite of it. I so sympathize with your situation and feel for you. It’s such a shame that you cannot just be openly who you are without fear of losing your job. For me I had to pull out of all church work because of the attitudes in the church in my country and was told in my teaching (I am home schooling) that I could not take children in my group other than those of my family – same as losing my job in a sense. If I sought employment I would have to keep quiet about being gay, though having separated from my wife and resigned from church posts, it has become widely known that I am gay. People think you are a pervert and dangerous. Even my own daughter is worried for the safety of my grandchildren; I ask you!!! Really. It’s quite pathetic.

Leave a Reply